The great champion of folk music has left us. Rest well Pete Seeger. He lost his wife, Toshi just 6 months ago. Johnny Cash passed only 4 months after his wife, June Carter. A personal favorite about the paradoxes of the English language: English is cuh-ray-zee! English is the most widely spoken language in the history of the planet. One out of every seven human beings can speak or read it. Half the worlds books, 3/4 of the international mail are in English. It has the largest vocabulary, perhaps two million words, And a noble body of literature. But face it: English is cuh-ray-zee! Just a few examples: Theres no egg in eggplant, no pine or apple in pineapple. Quicksand works slowly; boxing rings are square. A writer writes, but do fingers fing? Hammers dont ham, grocers dont groce. Haberdashers dont haberdash. English is cuh-ray-zee! If the plural of tooth is teeth, shouldnt the plural of booth be beeth? Its one goose, two geese. Why not one moose, two meese? If its one index, two indices; why not one Kleenex,two Kleenices? English is cuh-ray-zee! You can comb through the annals of history, but not just one annal. You can make amends, but not just one amend. If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one, is it an odd or an end? If the teacher taught, why isnt it true that a preacher praught? If you wrote a letter, did you also bote your tongue? And if a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? English is cuh-ray-zee! Why is it that night falls but never breaks and day breaks but never falls? In what other language do people drive on the parkway and park on the driveway? Ship by truck but send cargo by ship? Recite at a play but play at a recital? Have noses that run and feet that smell? English is cuh-ray-zee! How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same When a wise man and a wise guy are very different? To overlook something and to oversee something are very different, But quite a lot and quite a few are the same. How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell the next? English is cuh-ray-zee! You have to marvel at the lunacy of a language in which your house can burn down While it is burning up. You fill out a form by filling it in. In which your alarm clock goes off by going on. If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Well, English was invented by people, not computers And reflects the creativity of the human race. So thats why when the stars are out, theyre visible, But when the lights are out, theyre invisible. When I wind up my watch I start it, but when I wind up this rap, I end it. English is cuh-ray-zee!
Posted on: Tue, 28 Jan 2014 11:02:24 +0000
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