The stench that wafted through the east end of my house was horrific. My son discovered the source under my bedroom window, a dead possum. Not long after, while brewing my elixir of life, I shattered the coffee pot all over the kitchen floor, a glorious way to greet the day...dead possums and dropped pots. It has been one of those weeks, that has rolled into another one of those weeks; the kind of chaos where one holds on for all it’s worth, while interjecting prayer to heaven asking for strength and calm. Today is one of those mornings where I jokingly say, “I want to run away with the circus” to mask the overwhelmed emotion I am feeling. The list of what is not right or rather of what is upside down begins with my daughter who is attending Biola, desperately seeking, in tears at times, what she is supposed to be when she grows up, what she should be majoring in, while battling the loneliness found in the crowds of a university. My momma’s heart breaks as I talk with her late into the night, giving the scant advice I can offer and praying passionately for her. She is walking the waves, looking to Jesus, seeking His direction and His friendship, while feeling so alone. She is waiting on final provision for her mission trip to Albania, and her faith muscles are being severely stretched. My mother’s heart has to let go and allow God to move as I do not have the Bactine, Band-Aids or kisses to fix this. God is in control and in this I must rest. Jeremiah 29:11 promises me that He has my girl’s life in His perfect plan and purpose and Hebrews 12:2 reminds me that Christ is the Author and Finisher of her faith, while Philippians 1:6 tells me to be “confident of this that He who began a good work in her will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” (my own paraphrase). The next wave that has attempted to capsize this ship occurred in my husbands life when he injured his back a week ago Monday. Again, not being able to remove the pain has forced my eyes to heaven as the place of ultimate healing and rest. The doctor’s appointments and prescription drug runs have compounded the craziness of my life and I have to go to the Rock that is higher than I to seek refuge. Only by redirecting my eyes can I see beyond what is “now” in my life. I cling to the Scripture that says, “For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison” (2 Corinthians 4:7). I know that in this world there will be trials and tribulations, but Christ has overcome (John 16:33) and gives us the faith we need to be more than conquerors through Him who loved us (Romans 8:37). On the days when the circus looks like a viable option, when dead possums stink up one’s life and the coffee one needs lies shattered on the floor, this is when our hope in heaven grows stronger. The desire for something other than what this earth has to offer stirs in our hearts. C.S. Lewis wrote in Mere Christianity, “Most people, if they had really learned to look in their hearts, would know that they do want, and acutely, something that cannot be had in this world.” We long for what is not found here, especially when “here” has trials under which we struggle. Ecclesiastes 3:11 says, “He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.” The things in life that are shattered and broken are being made beautiful in God’s time and we desire that which is eternal and of God. We yearn for the very thing that we cannot fathom. The lyrics to this song, Brokenness Aside, have ministered to me over the past few weeks. If your life feels like it is unraveling, turn your eyes to heaven, to the Savior who is making all things new. May this song help your focus on the One who loves and gave His all for you. Will your grace run out, if I let you down ‘Cause all I know, Is how to run ‘Cause I am a sinner, if its not one thing its another Caught up in words, tangled in lies You are the Savior and you take brokenness aside And make it beautiful Beautiful Will you call me child, when I tell you lies Cause all I know, is how to cry All Sons and Daughters
Posted on: Sat, 18 Oct 2014 05:58:22 +0000
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