The time has come for me to do some serious soul searching to decide what it is that I really want to do in life. I need to find my dream. I have been in the same profession for 19 years (since high school) and it was never my dream to be in this. Just something I happened to do well. Plus I think it served as a stable area of my life when my life fell apart and I think I just held on to it for fear of the unknown. When the rug gets pulled out from underneath you a few times you get scared to leave secure places. So I think I stopped dreaming about what it is that I really wanted to do in life. A long time ago I wanted to be a DJ and then wanted to be a nurse but those dreams were put on hold because of a choice I made because I was so eager to leave my parents house so I could be free. And then more recently I wanted to be a marriage family therapist. Now I am not so sure. This is a weird stage for me in life. I know the possibilities are endless if I only put my mind and heart into it. I am going to break down some serious walls I have had around me...the ones that have prevented myself from being the real me. Not the scared me. Not the scared person who is so worried about what people think of her. Not the person that will do or say anything to make others happy at the expense of her own happiness. Its time for me to deal with my past from yesterday to as far as I can remember past and face my inner demons and to feel the pain instead of pushing it deep down. So that I can break free and finally heal my whole body so that way I can become healthier and happier. Time to improve me so I can be a better person, wife, mother, Aunt, and friend. So watch out world cause here I come :)
Posted on: Sun, 28 Sep 2014 06:29:35 +0000
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