The tumor on my larynx apparently leans against my voice box giving me a gravelly sound which I thought sounded something like the low growl of Kathleen Turner. However, Ive recently been told that its more akin to Tom Waits drinking battery acid. Sometimes it fades a little more than a whisper causing people to lean towards me when Im talking to them. This is a phenomenon I hadnt experienced before, and I notice that after a couple of minutes, they realize I dont have anything worthwhile to say and they wander off. Some things dont change. What has changed is that my hair has fallen out due to the chemotherapy Im getting. I was expecting this, but it was still a bit of a shock when it came out all in one day in great large clumps, clogging the shower drain. I went to Mike, the barber, to get it cut as short as its been since I was 11 or 12 years old. (Question: Are there any left-wing barbers?) When I was a kid, I always had a crew cut or a flat top. A flat top was essentially a crewcut with a little flap of hair in the front that was squared off with a board the barber put on your head. The hair was kept standing by applying a pink paste called Butch Wax. The problem was that I wore a baseball cap all the time back then and the Butch Wax would melt. When it melted, it would drip into my eyes, momentarily blinding me. This was my first experience of sacrificing myself for fashion. I didnt really want a flat top. I wanted to be a hoodlum and it seemed to me that the hoodlum look was like Elvis Presleys. I wanted long hair on top, swept back on the sides and a DA in the back. I would give very specific instructions to Mr. Gus at the Regency Barber Shop. Mr. Gus would listen intently, nod, and give me flat top. Then the Beatles came along and long hair became the fashion. Ive had long hair ever since. More out of lack of attention than any sense of being fashionable. Generally I would let it grow until it started to bother me. Another side effect of the chemotherapy is that my chest and arms are covered in unsightly pustules. These look like either pimples or large chicken pox blisters. Pustules and spotty hair are quite a come-down for someone who once finished second in the prestigious Best Looking Boy category at Easton High School. This was a vote given to seniors for the yearbook. I was edged out by Al Pope. Edged out in the same way that the Denver Broncos were edged out by the Seattle Seahawks in this years Super Bowl. George McGovern came closer to being president than I did to being Best Looking Boy. I think the only ones who voted for me were girls who felt sorry for my girlfriend, who was beautiful. (Im uncertain if she voted for me.) I would like to take this time to thank the two other people who voted for me. I saw Al at the class reunion a couple of years ago. He still looks great. Damn. I have had two episodes of vision impairment due to the chemotherapy. The first time I was driving and recognized that something was wrong although it was hard to describe it. I think what I experienced was when I moved my head, the background didnt move at the same pace. I pulled over and the symptoms went away quickly. The second episode was one where I was seeing double. Eventually my straight away vision cleared up, but I was seeing double peripherally. This only lasted for about 5 minutes also. The doctors wanted to make sure that the cancer hadnt spread to my brain, so I had to get an MRI (magnetic resonance imaging) of my brain. The brain scan showed nothing. Duh.
Posted on: Fri, 14 Mar 2014 12:26:20 +0000
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