The when’s and how’s of potty training (References: Potty training by Jane Gilbert and The Pocket Idiot’s Guide to Potty Training Problems by Alison Schonwald & George Sheldon) I get many questions from parents about when to potty train and frankly, the entire process would be easier if there was a specific age to start and a list of things to do. Unfortunately, like much of what happens in parenting, the entire process is dependent on your child and what works for him may not necessarily work for anyone else!! Some children develop the necessary physical, emotional and mental developmental skills when they are 18 months old (very few do this!!) and others are only ready when they are 4 years old. Some learn the process in a matter of days, while others take months. To give you some basic guidelines, there are a few skills that your child needs to have mastered before you can even begin the process: She must be able to recognise the signs that she needs to go to the toilet and hold it in long enough to get to the toilet She has to get to the potty or toilet, remove the necessary clothing and then sit down Finally, she must be able to wipe, get dressed, flush (if using a toilet not a potty) and wash her hands Wow!! Looking at this list, it’s amazing that 2 and 3 year olds are able to achieve this. However, it is necessary that your child is physically and mentally ready for this, in order to be able to Be aware of having a wet or dirty nappy Recognise when he is making a wee or a poo (I hope you don’t find these word offensive!!) and hopefully is able to tell you about it Tell you in advance when he needs to go Gain more control over his bladder and ‘hold on’ for a short while Firstly, a child is unable to voluntarily control the bowel and bladder muscles until she is at least 18 months old and there is a gap of 2 years from when the child is able to recognise that she is wet and then being able to hold it in and wait to get to a toilet. However, the entire process of potty training will be easier and quicker if your child is at the point of being able to ‘hold it in’. Also bear in mind that a child who is physically ready may not be emotionally ready to let go of nappies, although this level of emotional development usually occurs around the age of 3, when they are becoming more independent and starting to do things for themselves. Boys versus girls It’s not just a rumour that girls are ready to potty train earlier than boys; research has shown that on average girls are ‘dry’ approximately 4 months before boys, with day and night dryness being achieved at 35 months for girls and 39 months for boys. To be honest, the reasons why this occurs are not that important but it must be noted that if children are pushed into potty training too early, then there is a chance that they will regress and boys are far more likely to regress than girls are. When is my child ready??? There are a number of characteristic signs that will show you that your child is ready to learn so watch out for these: She frequently says “I can do it’, demonstrating her developing independence She is able to pull her trousers/underwear up and down by herself She has regular, formed bowel movements She is physically able to walk to the potty or toilet and sit down She knows what wee and poo are She can understand what you are saying and can follow basic instructions She is very interested in when family members go to the toilet Her nappy is dry for longer periods of time She may complain about her nappy being full or show that she is uncomfortable She may start removing nappies as soon as she has made a wee in them – thus going through far too many nappies a day!! She can recognise the feeling that she needs to go to the toilet and may even tell you beforehand So how do you do this?? Remember, children learn very well through imitation, so let them see what you are doing and explain what you are doing as well (children love all the gory details!). However, should you be uncomfortable about this, then use a doll or teddy bear to demonstrate Put a potty in your child’s bathroom or invest in a seat insert for the toilet and a stool to climb on and rest their feet on Chose terms that you are comfortable using to describe wee and poo and use them consistently Dress your child in clothes that are easy for them to remove and put back on – please avoid dungarees at this time! Pop your child on the potty or toilet at intervals throughout the day, particularly at the times that he often fills his nappy Give him something to look at, or read to him while he sits there to keep him interested initially Boys might find it easier to stand up and wee and a ping-pong ball in the toilet gives them something to aim at (it doesn’t flush away either!) Make sure you and the nursery school are doing the same thing so that your child experiences consistency Take a potty with you when you go out (if this is what your child is using), as he may not be comfortable using something different when you are out Let him take charge of when he wants to go Give him choices about the potty or toilet if he is resistant or move the potty to a different place Record his achievements on a star chart Don’t leave him wet as it will stop bothering him and delay him further Applaud success and ignore accidents Don’t flush the toilet while he is sitting on it If he is bothered by the splash then line the toilet or potty with some toilet paper Do: Carry spare clothes and wipes for when you are out and send plenty to school as well Encourage and praise, not just the results but the willingness to sit on the potty or toilet Be consistent and positive Work to your child’s timetable not your own Give occasional reminders to go to the toilet as they often get caught up in their play and can forget to go Don’t: Nag and ask if he wants to go all the time Lose your temper Make him sit him on the potty for hours Go over the top, while star charts and rewards are great, this is still a normal, natural thing to do Don’t put it off for too long and be careful not to start too soon Don’t be angry about any accidents they make, just clean it up, normalise it (“oops, an accident, that’s ok!”) and carry on. Don’t limit fluid intake in the hopes of limiting accidents When to get rid of the nappies completely: Firstly, wait until your child is accident free and comfortable during the day before you begin to address night training. In fact, let your child be dry during the day for a few months before you start on the nights. Signs that your child might be ready for night training: A dry nappy in the morning She wakes in the night and asks to go wee She removes her nappy in the night Her nappy leaks in the early morning She is keen to try without nappies To begin the night training: Talk it through with your child Make sure there are plenty of clean sheets and pyjamas on hand in case you have to change her in the middle of the night Make sure she can see her way to the bathroom, either leaving a light on or giving her a torch Make sure she goes to the toilet last thing at night and first thing in the morning Good luck for all of this and remember that potty training is not a race and there is no point in pushing your child to do something they are not ready to do. When the child has shown the necessary developmental level, as well as the interest to begin potty training, then the entire process usually goes much quicker and easier! However, if you are really concerned then consult your doctor or paediatrician.
Posted on: Thu, 29 Aug 2013 03:49:40 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015