There he was, in the garage with the door open. It was so hot, and he sat on on a chair in the middle of where the cars should be, but, there were no cars. Fire had left him far, my medic wouldnt come, one of the fire medics said, Hey, Tringale, its not safe... Be careful. I could see his bare chest, sweat covered, him sitting so still and breathing steady, looking, looking, forward but seeing elsewhere. I thought, No blood, no blood... its sealed. He turned and looked at me, a stout Philipino man in his 30s, with soft brown eyes, Hi. A small smile. Me, Hi. Im Rick. Small, steady breaths, fear, resolution, Please, dont leave. I wont hurt you. Me, I wont, I never do leave. Im with you. Why? I cant remember his name for sure... I remember his face... his belly.... the sweat dripping down his torso. Inside my head I screamed, Why! He turned and looked more directly at me, bore his eyes into my Soul, I was just so sad... thinking of them... she took them, and my heart. All I do is miss them, all the time... she never lets me see them. I miss them so much. Ill never see them again, now. Me, I know that pain. I wish you wouldnt have. Emil, I know. I can see you here with me, my pain in you. Theyre afraid. They wont even come close. Me, They never do. I always do. Can I kneel besides you, do what I can? Talk??? Emil, Please. Please, dont leave. I wish I could undo it. Me, I know. Its okay. We talked of his life, I of mine, of our Kids we love but never get to see. Airway, Breathing, Circulation, Vitals... Secondary! I still feel it now. I gently rubbed the bulge on the other side... almost through. We held hands, I embraced one shoulder with my other hand. There was an Officer writing a green sheet in the far corner... Why?! Dont degrade him anymore!!!, my mind screamed. He didnt want the mask on, just to look at me. I worked with slow tears, and a smile, we cried, and talked. I stabilized the front with rolls, padded the rear. Got an IV? Me? A medic? Dont remember who. Me, Its time. Emil, I know, please stay. Me, Okay. Somebody drove my ambulance, I stayed with him as we rolled code to Eden? HACH? Who was on divert? Traffic? I dont remember. Double bore IVs, O2 15lpm, Shock Position, Monitor, SLOW roll, Dont bump him! Others were with me, a blur, only me and him mattered. Me, Were here. Emil, Im scared. Me, No Worries! A big grin. Rolled him to the Trauma Room, floated him onto the table. Me, I have to go now, I want to remember you like this... before they do it. Emil, I love you. Me, I love you too. Say Hi to my Dad. Youll like him. Emil, Okay Rick. Me, I wish I could have done more. Emil, You were great! No Worries!!! Me, Copycat!, a smile and a wink and I was gone. Rolling the gurney back to the ambulance.... They pulled the blade after sedation... LONG, WIDE, blade.... The hilt between his chest, and the tip poked just under the skin of his back... I cried and put my ambulance back together for another call.... Emil died on that table... He had put the blade in himself.... He was just too sad... We never met til that day... Another Day, Patient, Brother, I never forget... --Tringale, Rick, EMT-1A, Medic 565, Al.Co. AMR, ALS 911 System, Feb17,98 - May19,06 #NeverForget #ItsJustABoxOfTragediesAndTriumphs #DontTrySuicide #APermanentSolutionToATemporaryProblem #NeverForget
Posted on: Wed, 15 Oct 2014 11:16:07 +0000
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