This article really struck a chord with me: newrepublic/article/118747/ivy-league-schools-are-overrated-send-your-kids-elsewhere My friends list has more people who dont know me in real life than that do, so heres a bit of my back story: School came easily to me. I acted up because I was always bored, so when I was in 5th grade, they ran me through some standardized tests to see what sort of work I needed to be doing to keep me occupied. Never having seen any of the material, I deduced and intuited enough to get an A on the Algebra I end-of-course test. At that time, they asked if I wanted to skip anywhere from 1 to 3 grades in school. I talked it over with my parents, and decided to stay where I was at. Even at 10 years old, I knew my friendships with my classmates were more important than more academic rigor. Even if I could have handled the course work, I knew Id regret it socially. Skip ahead a few years. When I was 14, I got a perfect score on the SAT (math and reading. I hate you too, writing section. Glad youre getting nixed) having never studied or prepped for it. The only reason I took it that early was because my brother, whos 2 years older, was taking it so he could apply to college, and my parents wanted to get both out of the house for the morning. At that time, I started getting letters from colleges telling me to skip my last 3 years of high school. However, it was the same decision as when I was in elementary school. So what if I could have handled college level work? Did I really want to be the one kid on campus who was too young to have a drivers license? When it actually came time to apply to colleges, I had my sights set on Duke. I also applied to Harding, a small religious school, because thats where my brother was and thats where my parents wanted me to go, but I never really planned on going there. Fast forward a couple months. I got into both, and got full tuition at both. I was the kid who should have gone to Duke. I was student body president, valedictorian, and competing at a very high level in my sport. But it never really felt right. I went to several meet-and-greets for kids who were being recruited by schools like that. And for the first time in my life, I felt socially isolated. I love people, I make friends easily, and on the whole I think I connect well with people in spite of being a little weird. But these kids were different. I wanted to make friends. They wanted to size me up. I wanted to talk about what sorts of bands they were listening to. They wanted to ask my test scores. I asked if they wanted to head out for coffee after the meet-and-greet. They had to go home to study some more to bump their 2250 SAT score up to a 2300. Up until the point I had to make a decision, I was always leaning toward Duke. But I just couldnt pull the trigger. And this isnt an indictment of people who DID go to top tier schools (I know quite a few of you will read this. Those of you I grew up with or know in real life - this isnt about you. You guys are great.). Im sure there are a lot of grounded people who do. But on the whole, the people I met who were on that track just didnt seem to have any perspective. Why are you studying so hard? To get into the best school. Why do you want to go to the best school? To get hired by the best company. If you can make a comfortable living doing what you want, why does it matter? I mean, whats the end game? I can see how that will bring you prestige, but how will that make you happy and make you feel fulfilled? ........... Finally, for reasons I didnt fully understand at the time - more of a nagging intuition; a subconscious aversion - I ended up pissing off my teachers and friends and going to Harding. And it was a great decision. I learned a lot, but Im sure the academics werent as challenging as Id have gotten at Duke. However, I could actually relax and enjoy the experience, taking everything in stride. The people were great, and I had a lot of down time to read and write and learn on my own. Most importantly, I didnt have to survive on a diet of red bull and adderall to keep my head above water (which I heard from quite a few people who went to more prestigious schools). Of course, there are down sides. Im sure I get a much different reaction when I have to explain its a little religious school in Arkansas. You probably havent heard of it instead of being able to say I went to Duke. But do I think I made the right call, and would I do it all over again? In a heart beat. Do money and status matter? Sure, to a point. But after that point, you start getting diminishing returns (further reading: nytimes/2012/07/08/opinion/sunday/dont-indulge-be-happy.html). Ultimately, social connections are much more important. Being lonely carries with it the same morality risk as heavy drinking or a life time of smoking (plosmedicine.org/article/info%3Adoi%2F10.1371%2Fjournal.pmed.1000316#pmed-1000316-g006). Chasing status, if it comes at the expense of your relationships, is ultimately self-defeating. So, to bring this all full-circle: those of you who Ive known forever - Im glad youre in my life. Those of you who I only know through Facebook - I hope we can meet some day. Id take you guys over a 6 figure per year job or a prestigious piece of paper any day.
Posted on: Tue, 22 Jul 2014 17:48:37 +0000