This is a story I recently wrote. Hope you enjoy. Summer Pests by Chad Gaul Ah, summer pests. We know ‘em when we see ‘em—in our hair, on our windows, inside and outdoors, invading our barbecue or evading our presence. They’re everywhere. Of course, they’re living, breathing creatures just like people are. But the average person can only take so much. We have our reasons to call them bugs because they bug us. We have our reasons to call them pests because they’re a pest, especially when they flutter over my BARBECUE RIBS! That’s why I prefer dining indoors. I do all of my cooking indoors. Have been for as long as I can remember. I’m not an expert on insects. Entomology is not my forte. But I do share a unique fascination for certain types of insects. Specifically, the ones that don’t fly and the ones that are least aggressive. Take for instance, Madagascar hissing cockroaches. I’ve held one in my hand before when I was taking Biology at Western Iowa Tech. It really clutched on my finger and wouldn’t let go. I remembered I wasn’t the least bit scared. I wanted to hold one. Then you have tarantulas. Perhaps the most fascinating, exotic looking creatures I’ve ever laid eyes on. Most people fear them, but I don’t. Maybe it’s because I’m aware that most tarantulas are harmless to humans. Not all, but most. They can still inflict you with a painful bite only if you make them mad or make them scared. Still, their bites are no worse than bee stings. Which brings me to my next subject—bees, as well as wasps, hornets, or anything that flies with a prick up its ass. Those are the insects I evade at all costs. Bees and wasps can be quite aggressive. I’ve never been stung before. I’m not even 100% sure if I’m allergic to bee venom. I’ve never experienced anaphylactic shock in my life. Not once. And I refuse to find that out the hard way. Another summer pest is ants. Luckily, I’ve never had an infestation of these revolting foot soldiers in my apartment. They’re not going to be filching my bread crumbs under my nose anytime soon. I clean my counters, I take out my trash, I mop my floors, I vacuum my rugs, I dust my belongings, and I leave no morsel of food unattended. Ants have always been the least of my worries. I don’t know why. I hardly get them. The red imported fire ants, or RIPA, are the worst, especially if you live in southern United States. They have one of the most painful stings any insect could give you which could leave you with a necrotizing infection. Amazing what Animal Planet can teach you. But the number one killers are the mosquitoes. Over 2 million people die every year from mosquito bites because they can spread malaria and other harmful diseases that affect our immune system. That’s more deaths than from any other pestilential creepy-crawlies that sting, bite, or spread disease. The Off spray we apply to our bodies is the only artillery we have against these mosquitoes when hiking or going to your neighbor’s barbecue or some other outdoor event. One mustn’t live in fear about these pests. I’ve had a few bugs enter my domain five floors up. And believe me, they weren’t breathing anymore when they crossed my path. I was even lucky I didn’t have any ginormous ants deliver me pizza. I’ve got enough things going on in my life than worrying about pests. To me, summer is all about having fun and spending quality time with family and friends as much as possible. And I don’t let pests become a nuisance to my everyday living.
Posted on: Mon, 29 Jul 2013 20:05:46 +0000
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