This is something that’s needed a dissertation for a long time. A lot of guys get snide comments from girls in a particular setting. This setting appears often, and it can happen to YOU. I’m talking about when you enter or exit a building. Not even buildings. Any place with a door. There are four ways this situation can play out: 1. The guy opens the door for the girl. 2. The guy opens the door, enters it, and lets it close behind him so the girl is eternally trapped outside. Girls can’t open doors, but that still means he’s an asshole. 3. The girl opens the door for the guy. 4. The girl opens the door, enters it, and lets it close behind her so the guy has to open the door for himself. Guys can open doors, but that means she’s probably mad at you, so you may want to go wait in the car. Let’s take a quick look at option 1. Whenever I open a door for a girl, I usually get one of two responses: the first is no response. That’s okay, because I open doors all the time. It’s not like I had to try very hard (I’m strong like ox), plus I usually have to walk inside anyways. The second response I might get is anger. But not REAL anger, just that weird unspoken ‘don’t-take-care-of-me’/’I-can-do-it-myself-thank-you-very-much’ kind of indignant behavior. Again. I usually don’t care. Not that big of a deal, and my lady friend can usually suck it up. Sorry, ladyfriends. Option 2-3, however, means that I didn’t open the door for the girl. Uh oh. In any of the above options, I would be a dick because I wasn’t being chivalrous. Girls like to throw that word around as if they know what it means, or how it pertains to society. I’m sorry, but most of you don’t, and wouldn’t like the repercussions of a chivalrous society. First off, I’d like to clarify that I have nothing against holding the door open for a girl. Or a guy. Really, it’s just that. It’s nice to do things for other people sometimes. Men, if you want your dates to go well, open the door for your date. Now, what bothers me about the idea of chivalry, is that there is an inherent expectation that women should be treated equal to, if not better than men. I’m making no statements about the value of men verses the value of women, but rather an observation. If women ought to be treated differently than men, then there’s a serious problem. Let’s take a step backwards and look at the history of chivalry. The part of chivalry that women all want to see is the third of a three-tier chivalrous code, under duties to women. It talks about how knights are serve their lady, and after her, all ladies- displaying gentleness and graciousness to women. Sounds great, doesn’t it, ladies? The reason for this code had something to do with the culture and times in the 12th century. Women were not men’s equals, and furthermore, had few to no rights. Women with few to no rights who were thought to be more frail, weak, and less intelligent than men. Now, we know these things to be untrue, and come the late 1800’s to the early 1900’s we have even gone so far as to fight for women’s rights in politics and the workplace. All these things are good things, however, they bring up the important question of whether or not chivalry should still apply. Women, you have fought so hard to take your rightful place in society. To be treated as equals. If you’re looking for some extra kindnesses just because, you’re probably thinking a little selfishly. Have some self-respect and cut that shit out. Plenty of people will treat you the way you deserve. Don’t hound on the guys who treat you like you can open your own damn door. Because you can.
Posted on: Fri, 28 Jun 2013 11:46:09 +0000