This is the 2:00 afternoon report from Mayberry by the sea......according to my wife......every southern girl needs a nerve pill and a hanky in their purse......well...I turned in my man card a long time ago and I dont miss it one bit......but I could have used a nerve pill and a hanky about a half ago......yep.....thats right......I caught the end of the movie Titanic on TV here in the studio and all I want to do is curl into a fetal position and weep it was so romantic!!!!...but I flipped the channel in a nick of time and now I am rocking the band HEART live in concert with a full orchestra behind them.....and I can tell you this.....these sisters still know how to rock a house down......its giving me energy to get up and paint after my weekly journey down the street to the land of eggs benedict...AKA.....High Thymes where upon entering I went to the kitchen door and made the proclamation that I would murder for bacon!!!!!......10 minutes later I destroyed a plate of eggs benedict and a side of bacon in 11 seconds and was out the door......last night the fog rolled in from the sea and this morning the island was socked in...It muffled the sounds and everything was silent except the morning symphony of birds and crickets in the dunes........a big difference from the last few mornings.....two mornings ago we were strafed by a warplane with the mouth of a tiger shark painted on each side of the nose....and for the last two nights we have been visited by UFOs...I have both incidents on camera and was about to claim my 15 minutes of fame to the world.....until.... I learned that the warplane trying to terrorize and take over was really just the plane that sprays for mosquitos...and the strange green and red blinking lights that flew over the dunes a couple of nights ago...circled the lighthouse with a strobe light that illuminated the area as it passed over head as well as the two I saw last night flying last night in formation over the oaks and the tin rooftops...were not UFOs at all....they were remote controlled drones with flashes built on to them...part of a landscape project conducted by four guys with walkie talkies and cameras........last night I watched the stars overhead and it just confirms to me that the world is infinite and we are but a speck...the sweeping light of the lighthouse passed overhead every minute or so and was beautiful to watch as it cut into the darkness searching for lost ships and souls.....so peaceful..........once a writer from New York City said it was the ugliest lighthouse he had ever seen.....fighting words!!!!!.......we love our lighthouse!!!...who cares it it looks like it belongs in Thunderdome in a Mad Max movie...who cares if it isnt round with cute white and black strips.....boring!!!!....it triangular...futuristic looking and cool and edgy!!!......so dont insult out lighthouse!........ but he redeemed himself when he looked past the lighthouse and saw a sea of stars like he had never seen.....he said he has not seen stars since he moved to NYC.....and said it was beautiful and that he was mesmerized by it......I told him I cuss gravity every damn time I look up at it........I wondered if the star I was looking up at last night...way up there...I wondered if someone was looking back down at me......then a friend rode his bike by and we chatted..I told him about a new way I wanted to cut up and be silly on Facebook......he said lets hear it......I said...I want to start carrying around a phony microphone or a big paint brush........a camera and a tripod...... and stop and do random 5 minute interviews with people on the street...the beach.....anywhere.....and say I am a reporter with.....MBTSNN...The Mayberry By The Sea News Network....and this is the 5 MINUTES WITH AN ARTIST SHOW............a ask questions about anything......love...life......politics....whatever....if he is changing a flat tire ..treat it like breaking news and get the what...who....when...where...and how it happened and bring you minute by minute action.....with all the seriousness of Walter Cronkite or Brian Williams....and close with each segment with a catchy closing phrase like......and thats the way the tide rolls here in Mayberry by the sea today...or something like that while talking into a phony microphone or a paintbrush in front of the video camera.....with my painting shirt on and a cool pair of shades....I think it would be fun...but then the little voice inside said....Ahhhh.....UUUuuuummm...maybe not Mickey......they may lock you up for that one.........Mayberry by the sea...where the song birds sing through my open door and where the sun today is diffused by the fog offshore and the sheer clouds overhead bathing everything in a wonderful diaphanous white light..and painting the sea in silver......take care...
Posted on: Sun, 23 Mar 2014 18:54:00 +0000
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