This is why You Kenyans are Ranked as the Riskiest People in the World: Find out!! Kenya is ranked as one of the most frightening and dangerous places to be, in the world. For real, it is the only country where every breathing species is at an uncertain extinction peril. In fact, it is the only environment where even the hardcore criminals feel unsafe. In case you doubted this, just hold on, sit back and watch as I disentangle every cloaked fact about this grandmother of jumbo historical injustices. For those who feel offended, kindly pardon my French. It’s a free world anyway. Firstly, as I write this, I am compelled by my conscience to put up with the fact that Kenya is not only the biggest, but also the strongest enemy of free speech. However, just like Marie Curie once put it, nothing in life is to be feared; it is only to be understood. Kenya is the only country on earth that encompasses overweening perilous wolves elegantly attired in sheep gowns. Back in Gusiiland where I was born and bred thirty something years ago, my great grandfather before joining his ancestors, used to remind me that pure love and suspicion cannot dwell together; therefore, through the same door where the latter enters, the former makes its exit. In elucidation, what that true son of his great forefathers meant in his wise words is that, it is always good to speak the truth. My learned friend and namesake Albert Einstein jokingly opined that When you are courting a nice girl, an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder, a second seems like an hour.” Einstein never knew that his words could someday eventuate in the situation in Kenya. Staying in Kenya for a second seems like being incarcerated in Guantanamo bay for an hour, staying for an hour is tantamount to being locked in hell for a century. Staying for a day is as equivalent as being locked in a city public Morgue for an entire millennium. There comes a time when a daughter has no confidence in her dad, a time no one is any other’s keeper. Kenya is the proud home of both white and blue collar crimes; tribalism, corruption, nepotism, money laundering, fraud, mass murders rape, zoophilia and incest just to mention but a few. Spellbindingly, to survive here, who you know does not matter, what matters is what you know about who you know. Getting a white or a blue collar job does not matter how many PHDs you hold, but how valid your surname is. They say that a man’s life is a difficult one, during birth; he struggles to get out of that hidden bushy “junction” but yet, he industriously spends most of his entire life trying to get back. Here in Kenya things are different. Stressful moments never allow Kenyan men to visit the “bushy junctions” where they came from. Importantly, the junction owners have resolved to seek help from elsewhere. Common citizens have become fools because they are alarmingly rushing in where their angels – politicians – fear to tread. They have resolved to worship the politicians/murderers. They have now turned adversaries of each other, unreasonably slitting themselves with machetes as their kings dine together in five star hotels while they play spectators on them. The obits/obituary sections of our daily newspapers are always filled beyond capacity, thanks to the element of hate propagated by the moneyed bloodthirstiest politicians. Nevertheless, as Otto Von Bismarck warned “Only a fool learns from his own mistakes. The wise man learns from the mistakes of others,” Kenyans are poor candidates of history. They never zip up. They never learn from the past. They never learn from the mistakes of their neighbors. That is the reason why they will forever remain the riskiest species on planet earth. Albert Nyakundi Amenya – Banana Pedlar, the County of Kisii
Posted on: Sun, 29 Jun 2014 06:17:54 +0000