This isnt meant to be a comparison against stay at home moms vs. working moms; both are vital and needed to each family dynamic and I have deep respect for both; this is just my little tid bit from my life today. I became a full time stay at home mom when Elli was born; and most days its pretty repetitive and run of the mill. Some days are hard - when Elli is cluster feeding and I cant put her down, Evan is, for whatever reason, in a mood and screams at everything, the house is a wreck, no way is dinner getting done on time, and I feel like I accomplished absolutely nothing. I think thats been my biggest challenge with being a SAHM, I feel like most days I dont accomplish a whole lot. Like, some days, its a feat that I got to brush my teeth and put on real pants. And Im not exaggerating, some days thats as far as I can get. And that does a lot to a womans self esteem (at least mine anyway), I think, some days I just feel like nothing I do adds to absolutely diddly squat. And the loneliness you feel some days, like, all you want is for someone, anyone to just talk with you. Not at you. Not to you. Not to get something out of you. Just with you for five minutes about something other than being a mom or housekeeper. I know, I know this is my identity now and this was our choice for me to become a SAHM because it was what was best for our family; and Im not bemoaning or regretting that decision. The good outweighs the bad; but some days are just harder than others and I just want people to know that assuming SAHMs do nothing all day is the farthest thing from the truth. I am not saying our job is any harder than anyone elses. Im not going to sit here and say that our job is akin to a doctor because we kiss boo boos, or a teacher because we teach our kids etc. But our job is just as important to society, and it is a job that is typically riddled with unappreciation and sarcasm from society; so before you make the crass comment that someone is just a stay at home mom/dad I just want you to really think long and hard about what raising kids actually entails. How you would feel if you were in that position. What you would like someone to say to you. Because from what Ive experienced, and from what Ive talked with with other SAHPs, we are the hardest critics to ourselves and society isnt helping. All parents, regardless of occupation, are in the trenches of raising kids. We second guess every decision. We scrutinize every mistake. We sincerely hope were not screwing up our kids and sincerely want whats best for them and aspire to raise decent human beings. Having our lifes work so easily dismissed, undervalued and unappreciated is really, really frustrating.
Posted on: Fri, 11 Jul 2014 13:12:12 +0000
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