This morning I was awoken by the shake of Pickles twitching in her sleep. My dog has a vivid imagination and dreams with her whole body. I sleepily put my hand on her to wake her up so that both of us could calmly fall back asleep, only to feel that this was different. After whispering her name turned into alarm and my petting turned into pleading, I turned on the light to see that she was seizing. I frantically looked up the address of a 24-hour vet, scooped her up, and sped to the hospital with her on my lap. Within the ten-minute drive, my sweet girl passed away. The vet said that due to the length of her seizure it is likely that she overheated and suffered brain damage. She swears to me that Pickles felt no pain. That with seizures the dog is likely unaware of what is happening at all. I choose to believe this because I don’t think I could stomach to think of her suffering. I did not pay to have them do a necropsy to find out what caused the seizure, but based on my conversation with the vet, it seems that the small quirks I loved about Pickles may have been signs and symptoms of a brain tumor. I fell in love with her the moment my best friend brought that ball of fluff to my door. The past five years have been filled with so many kisses, giggles, cuddles, road trips, eaten shoes, and bed hogging. She taught me I was capable of loving someone even when I thought I didn’t have any love to give. She gave me extra attention when she knew I was sad; I really could use her support right about now. I will not pretend to understand how the bond between a person and their pet can be so strong, but I am so grateful to have experienced it. I am sorry I worked so much. I am sorry that sometimes I cut our walks short. I am sorry that I didn’t give you attention every time you asked for it. I’m sorry that your last day was spent waiting for me to get home from work and then watching me grade papers for hours instead of playing with you. But you loved me anyway, and I am so lucky to have known a love so genuine and unselfish. I am going to miss the joy your brought to my life more than I think I can bear. The passing of my pup happened on the eve of a trip planned to celebrate a wonderful year with a wonderful man. I am grateful for the opportunity to get away because the thought of being home without her there is overwhelmingly painful. I will intentionally be out of touch for the next few days, but please know I appreciate all the support and love from my friends and family.
Posted on: Tue, 21 Oct 2014 08:44:47 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015