This morning at 1am as I sat alone in-front of the TV drinking hot tea winding down from a long day. I didnt know how to feel or what to think, all I knew is that I was going to be on television in a few minutes. Before that I was watching an episode of Seinfeld because its part of the programming that came on before The Will Edwards Show- which was funny because it took me back to my childhood. It reminded me of the late nights as a kid when I couldnt sleep because of all the thoughts I had in my head about life! Where we came from and what my purpose was? Alone watching TV yet mentally somewhere else- I felt solitude because I realized that this was a big moment for me. Especially because less than two years ago people told me I sucked and that music wasnt my thing. Than I thought to myself- haha how much of a loser am I? such a dope moment yet no body to share it with.. I shouldve probably gotten a group of friends, fans and supporters together to watch it!! Woulda been a cool marketing stunt lol, than as soon as the show started airing in-between segments I started getting tags on my social media and texts from people watching at home. Sharing that moment with me in their own solitude and/or environment. I was no longer alone, and even if I was I embraced it because alone is where I find myself and spend most of my time. Alone is where the experiences take place that I write about in my music- but its ok.. I have my group of people that hold me down and keep me going when things get hard. I dont need them around me 24/7, I still work endless days and nights for them- so that they may no longer have to suffer from mediocrity one day. When I saw my performance I felt like screaming in triumph! ( I actually did aha) Because Ive been through so many situations that made those close to me tell me I was a failure- on a one way road with no future. Ive even told myself that at times- but yesterday I felt it.. I felt success in such a strong wave, because I knew anyone watching at that moment was engaged and drawn to my energy. I even got a text asking me how I can perform for cameras and make it seem like theres millions of people cheering me on! I closed my eyes and my questions as a child were now answered because this came from my heart and it gave me purpose. If youve stuck with me this long I should let you know I am writing this in hopes of inspiring one of you to go after that moment or area in life. That most are afraid of going after because it seems bigger than life itself at the moment.. And also so I can look back at it on any given day that I am alone again questioning myself. So that I may relive this moment of triumph! And continue pushing forward towards my dreams. Thank you all so much for your support I appreciate it and will continue to do what I can to motivate, inspire and reach the world through my music and my life. #ULYSSES
Posted on: Sat, 16 Aug 2014 03:10:37 +0000