This post is too long. You may need to borrow Rtd Colonel Dr Kizza Besigye Kifefe Warrens patience to read to the end. Village belles via a vis Uptown babes. On having innumerable experiences with both sets of Eves daughters, here is how I dissected their way of doing things. Village belles. These ones are simply irresistibly irresistible and got that midas touch on everything they touch. If you are the type that does local foods, your daily menu will get suffocated with roasted maize, cassava, potatoes and a giant flask of bushera(millet porridge). If you are lucky those foods aint roasted, you will get a full mixture of the above just served in a single meal. I see my bakiga friends already salivating. Relationships: These ones are too good at maintaining relationships that you can invite her over and she uses the door mat as her beddings. By the fact that you dont get some, the relationship naturally keeps on. She wont bother you checking your phone. They naturally fear smart phones and this makes your Lillys, Pretty Glos, Jennies safe. Phone calls and texts. If she doesnt borrow her mums katorch to beep you and then hide it under the armpit waiting for you to call, she will call you and speak in a heavy accent, Harro Turyagumanawe Silverious?. If the phone doesnt break into countless pieces, wanaba olweza. If she decides to text, you will read the text till Arsenal wins the Premier league. Area code. They are so proud of their village names that they would pronounce them to you and invite you to visit her parents just in the second week of the relationship. And these village names, Kyabandara, Nyakiborera, Buwanhume are too botanical that you would forget them before she finishes saying the name. Maintenance. For the broke guys, this is our kill. A date may only cost you 1k(Uganda shs). Cool cool bar and pop corns would simply make her evening memorable. They keep their hair short and use samona herbal jelly to keep their baby faces shinning bright like a diamond. You dont have to spend on saloon. Uptown babes. I find these too contagiously irresistible. Who wouldnt want to tag along with a plethora of this species?? Few can put a decent meal together. If she visits and you ask her to prepare any meal, she will be quick to equip, baby, lets eat out.. She has no idea the junk food she gallops at break neck speed is the reason she carries an elephant and hippo figure combined. Relationships: They are too good at maintaining relationships that your friends friends will have her nudies tucked in their phones. How they got there, Tamale Mirundi can only tell. Thats a whole long line of relationships growing from one. Who beats that?? Even the famous Desire wudnt. Phone calls and texts. Be ready to get suffocated with countless beeps and when you call back, you will only be told, I called to say hey. If you are lucky shes the type that calls, hold your rosaries and bibles firmly. She may be wanting to ask for your ATM card. Her texts will be a joy to watch. Luv u honie, k, g, WTF, LOL, LMFAO, FDC, NRM, Kabaka Yekka, UNICEF, EBOLA. Area code: If you always craved for a lie. Crave no more. Honey where are you?? In bed baby. The noise coming out of her room is as deafening as the saba saba missiles that ousted Idi Amin. If you ask her where she stays, expect responses like Bugos, Mulos, Bweyos, Munyos. Dont even dare to ask what those places are, you will get a humiliation that no one in history would rival. Maintenance. Broke dudes, hold your breath here. Heard of the phrase HIGH MAINTENANCE before?? You just read it now. This species of girls will run your miserable wallet dry and leave you singing Ndi boss. Sitya loss. Ambiance on Monday, National Theatre on Tuesday, Venom on Wednesday, KFC on the remaining days. And what shall you get at the end of the day?? Fake orgasm. If you are lucky you got some. She will also want the latest Brazilian weave on her head, can tell the difference between all hair pieces, weaves and extensions but cant differentiate between There, their, and they are,. Whats your pick???
Posted on: Thu, 13 Nov 2014 15:54:52 +0000
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