To bring you up to date in case you’re a low information voter or just kind of a doofus, President Barack Obama recently delivered an address to the nation in which he admitted that just about everything George W. Bush did in the Middle East was right, everything Obama himself said about Bush was wrong, and now we had to go back to war again because, dad gum it, he’d screwed the whole business up and only just realized his entire worldview was mistaken. He didn’t actually come out and say that. It was more like subtext. Anyway bottom line, Obama has declared that he is leading us from behind back to war with a bombing campaign against ISIL in Iraq and Syria. This will be very different from our last war in Iraq — the one George W. Bush won — because there will be no American boots on the ground and therefore no danger of American deaths or victory. Another difference between this war in Iraq and the one we actually won will be that Obama has assembled a coalition of 9 allies, instead of going it alone with only 34 allies like Bush did. Also, he says he’ll be getting our friends in the region to give us help, like really inexpensive rugs, and maybe one of those souvenir knives with the curved blades that fit so neatly between the first and second thoracic vertebrae of the spine.
Posted on: Tue, 23 Sep 2014 16:42:20 +0000
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