To my my soul mate, Jessie Tison. All of my life Ive felt incomplete, like something was missing. I felt a bitter emptiness inside, I felt nothing. As I was growing up I became compassion-less, feeling like I didnt fit in with people. To which I began to perceive I was inhuman. Of course in reality I was definitely human, but feelings over reality were always the cards my mind dealt me. When I first met Jessie, I went to her house with my friend because we needed something. When my eyes rested on Jessie, I felt warm. Oddly content with the new feeling, I said “Hi”. She returned my greeting with an awkward look and a somewhat comfortable “Hello”. Then my friend and I left. I didnt see her again. I felt hollow. Then school started. I found her to be in three of my classes. A day or two went by with the same warm feeling I felt when I first met her. Finally, in our second period I sat next to her and another friend. I dont remember what we talked about, or what we did, but after that class period we were friends. For once in my life, I felt a growing sensation inside of me where Ive known all along something was missing. I was feeling it start to fill itself in slowly. Week by week we were facing life together. Month by month we were becoming a whole. Eventually we were finally one. Two in one. Jessie Kay Lynn Tison is my soul mate. I was meant to be with her. When shes away, (this may sound ridiculous and unbelievable) I feel an ache. A literal ache. When we fight (which is not that often) in the moment of it all, I feel a drop in my chest. After it all I feel sick. It feels like all of my insides are gone, like theyve fallen to a deep place. Jessie makes a big impact on my life. Everything she says, does, feels, affects me. Sometimes when shes joking about something, Ill take it seriously and get really upset. I cant describe the connection her and I have. I cant find words to explain it, but I try to. Shes like a babies blanket. I cherish her more than anything. When I dont have her with me, Ill cry and throw a fit (its more feeling sad, and empty. Although sometimes I do cry). When I have her with me Im happy as can be, always having her by my side. Shes with me through every step of the way. The things we do together are weird and crazy. We often times say the same things at the same time, we think the same things, feel the same emotions. We tend to freak people out with how much we are alike, and connected we are. It even freaks us out at times. Jessie is many, many things to me. Shes my best friend, my lover, my mom, my dad, my sister, my brother, my cousin, uncle, aunt, grandma, grandpa. Shes so many different figures to me. All inspirational, fun, disciplining, important, and desired. She is all I need. People call us by each other names sometimes. Even our parents! Every time it happens we just shake our heads and say “Really?!”. Some people find our relationship awkward, and unhealthy. Which in some aspects it is. But when they say things such as “I think you two are far too attached to one another, and your relationship is unhealthy” I always think: Thats because you dont know what its like to be with your soul mate. Even though she is moving at the end of the summer, her and I are inseparable. Physically we are, but we will always be conjoined as one emotionally. We will never part. It will tear a hole through me not being able to be with her everyday, and getting through daily life with her (especially in school) but I know that she will always have a part of me, and I will always have a part of her to get through everything that comes our way. After all, thats what best friends are for. I love you Jessie. Youre a part of me. And that you will remain until the day I die.
Posted on: Wed, 25 Jun 2014 20:12:10 +0000
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