To the inboxer that just gave birth and didnt cook for her family.... I am still in shock to read some of the comments and still wondering if they are actually real... I will start like this the beliefs you did not work on will eventually backfire on you.... 1. Just given birth, cant cook..... I receive tons and tons of inbox from women complaining how they have been made to cook and wash after childbirth and I wonder if i am a mad person.... Fortunately for me I have my children through CS Caeserean and as soon as I was discharged from the hospital on my first child, I had to commute everyday to go by bus to visit her in intensive care unit and I did that for almost three months, plus cooking and washing. Yes my husband was very supportive but i still carried on with my normal household chores. With my second child, by third day after CS I was already at the wholesale market buying goods for my restaurant and grocery shop. Cooking for my restaurant and doing all sorts. When i was married to my ex husband, this attitude of in laws looking after you after childbirth was the genesis of what got me really mad at them and eventually broke my marriage if I go back down history but after understanding another culture and how things work abroad, I realised that for anyone to be waiting on in laws to support, that person have got misplaced priorities. In UK, America, Dublin Etc, we dont get that luxury and that has made many women abroad today to be mentally and emotionally sound beyond their peers. I am sorry if many of you dont like this but please do not say because you have just had a baby then you cannot cook at least for your family. YES SOME IN LAWS DO TAKE THE MEEKY BUT YOU NEED TO DISCUSS THIS DURING COURTSHIP WITH YOUR SPOUSE BEFORE CHILDBEARING, IS YOUR MOTHER COMING TO LOOK AFTER THE BABY.... No wonder my mother didnt get involved in that circle...... 2. You confronted one of his girlfriend? He beat you? You broke his windscreen?..... Ok before i say anything about that, maybe you can tell me how your marriage was before you got married to him because all you put down here are traces of a known cheating man that YOU DECIDED to endure this far but expecting changes after childbirth or marriage.... I stomached my ex husbands cheating habit for years and one day I wanted to break his car, but thank God my brother was there to stop me and to stop me with a good punch.... Human endurance is so little and that is why you retaliated after his action forgetting the fact that every action require a REACTION and a reaction that may not favour the initial action.... To your question what should you do, do exactly what majority have told you here, pick yourself up, look after your child AND STOP EXPECTING HIM TO BE RESPONSIBLE. You have too much expectations and that will continue to land you into more and more problems if you dont embark on standing on your feet. Ask women saying if it happens abroad, yes abroad there are rules and regulations. Both of you will get done. A friend of mine that merely went to her husbands girlfriends house was ban and warned by the police not to be seen 200metres from that area again, guess what, shes now paying someone to be taking her child to school because the 200meters is within her kids school. Yes the man will be arrested, go to prison for few months and so as you, you will be charged for damages and if your husband is extra mad, he will take you to court. Either way, violent dont solve any marital problem..... As per child support, abroad not everyone is getting help from their kids father, I can tell you that the majority are not getting any help and EVEN AFTER GOING TO CHILD SUPPORT AGENCY, NOTHING IS COMING OUT OF IT..... If you are lucky in America if hes working with HIS OWN PAPERS, YOU WILL GET SOMETHING... In all, rebrand yourself, treat your anger issues and cut down own your expectations.... Nowhere is rosy and most importantly, choose carefully next time ... Bless....
Posted on: Tue, 20 Jan 2015 06:38:35 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015