Today, International Survivors of Suicide Day, Patrick and I are on the beach where my boys grew up. Its so bittersweet. There is a view of the spot where they played beach volleyball so often. Were staying where I once worked, oh so long ago. It used to be a hotel. Now its a huge ugly condo. But, I look out at the beach and swear the boys are there. Their presence here is almost palpable. Yellow flags are flying, so I wont go in the water. Maybe next weekend. This is a day filled with both joy and sorrow. Just remember that, every time you feel the wind blow, its just my boys, running with the wind. They watch over those they love so dearly. I miss them desperately. If youre thinking of ending your life, please, ask for help. Pay attention to me. I dont want anyone else to ever have to live my lifemare. I certainly wish I didnt know now what I didnt know then, when my boys ran up and down this beach. Jason and Rick, I love you. Always have. Always will.
Posted on: Sat, 23 Nov 2013 21:30:04 +0000
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