Todays fluff lets them get some airTick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock. Gosh this is exciting, readers! Its that day of the year when every football manager has a chance to play James Bond, pulling off a heroic escape from certain doom with just seconds to spare! Or if you dont like that analogy, then picture, if you please, Sam Allardyce as a damsel in distress, tied to a railway track in high heels and an ill-fitting dress as the bullet train of relegation whizzes relentlessly towards him: can he possibly bust free before things get really gruesome?If Big Sam and West Ham do manage to wriggle their way out of danger, itll probably be by plunging Fulham even deeper into trouble and one perfect way to do that will be to hijack the Cottagers move for the Greek striker Kostas Mitroglu. West Ham may also finally get their clutches on Joleon Lescott provided Manchester City nab Porto centre-back Eliaquim Mangala, who could arrive at the Etihad along with another Porto player, the Brazilian midfielder Fernando.The Mill has actually seen that described as an audacious double swoop, which seems such a random choice of adjective that the paper that used it might just as easily have hailed the double swoop as secluded or rectangular. After all, what is so audacious about the richest club in the universe chucking around some loose change to secure two highly coveted players? If you were looking for an appropriate adjective to describe those transfers, you could try unnecessary, since neither play can play in the Champions League this season and City will win the Premier League title with or without them.Arsenal appear to know that to be true, which is why they, at least according to some reports, are going to buy no one today. Except maybe Dimitar Berbatov, assuming he can summon the zest required to write his name on a short-term deal. The Mill does not know what the Bulgarians signature looks like these days but suspects it features a wonderfully ornate D, I and M and perhaps an elegant T, a rather casual A and R and then just a squiggle that seems to trail off with a weary sigh.Meanwhile, a nostalgic Harry Redknapp is sitting in the car park of Queens Park Rangers training ground with his window down, desperately hoping that someone from Sky Sports News turns up and shows an interest in what hes up to today. For now, however, its just Harry and a few pigeons nattering about Rod Fanni, who has decided to turn down a move to Loftus Road to stay at Marseille. How Joseph Barton wishes he could do the same. Meanwhile, Marseille are hoping to spend today wrapping up the signing from Lorient of none other than the former Arsenal striker Jérémie Aliadière. Yes, hes still playing. Nantes, meanwhile, want to sign Arsenals Park Chu-Young. Yes, hes still at Arsenal.Ole Gunnar Solskjaers ongoing attempt to prove that Vincent Tan was right to replace a successful manager mid-season with a celebrity tyro could today involve Cardiff forking out to sign the Cagliari and Italy defender Davide Astori. Manchester Uniteds Nani is being pursued by Spurs and Internazionale. Meanwhile, United youngster Ryan Tunnicliffe is en route to Fulham.Middlesbrough are eyeing up Wolves former goal-getter Kevin Doyle. Joe Ledley is doing what Celtic cannot do, joining the Premier League, where he will help keep Crystal Palace. Finally, Leeds United appear to be ever closer to falling into the hands of Massimo Cellino, whose first move after completing his takeover could be to jilt Brian McDermott. His next move after that would be anyones guess. The Mill isnt ruling out the teams kit being changed to orange jumpsuits and Elland Road turned into an upmarket barber shop.Paul Doyletheguardian © 2014 Guardian News and Media Limited or its affiliated companies. All rights reserved. | Use of this content is subject to our Terms & Conditions | More Feeds
Posted on: Fri, 31 Jan 2014 09:18:46 +0000
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