Tomorrow I am going to marry Tiq Milan and my heart is literally bursting. My sweet sweet love and art making sister soulmate Gein Wong has flown in to New York so I can have a little family and a witness tomorrow. Adaku Utah is crafting our herb and magical filled corsages. So many lovely humans have shown up knitting a web of care and kindness around us. So much faith and knowledge of purpose needed to be here. I am deeply thankful to my queerness for bringing me here. I think about Brandon Wints words Not queer like gay. Queer like escaping definition. Queer like some sort of fluidity and limitlessness at once. Queer like a freedom too strong to be conquered. Queer like the fearlessness to imagine what love can look like… and pursue it”. I am so grateful to finally have this powerful Black revolutionary in my life, I am thrilled about the quickly manifesting potential of our combined energy, nurturing and creativity both for ourselves, our kin and our community. I have also decided to change my last name. My paternal grandfather raped my grandmother. He was a sugar plantation owner in Tobago and was referred to as massa by our family. I have never been proud to have this name and have often wondered when and how I would shift it. And in doing some deep soul searching I decided that I wanted the opportunity to join a clan, to be rooted in a family, something I have always sought. As the bastard child born to a single immigrant mother, home has always been illusive at best and violent at worst. I am clear and joyous as I prepare to make this transition. And for those who feel differently, I wish us all enough space in this intricately connected community to get our needs met without bringing each other negativity. I recognize the privilege that we have marrying in a world where all people are not granted self-determination regardless of their relationship status and recognize that although we are open about our lives and experiences that we will access heteronormative privileges and I remain deeply committed to a life devoted to increasing access to knowledge, and resources to communities most marginalized and working towards equity , power and self-determination for all life. I also know that Black families are increasingly in danger; threatened by the prison industrial complex, job insecurity, poverty and white supremacy. With that in mind, I am thankful and welcoming of love when I find it and I know that thislove, thisBlacklove is something worth fighting for until my very last breath. It is the most delicious love that I have known. And I am so honoured after many close calls to have made my way to him. Next July we will renew our vows back in my old stomping grounds in Toronto, and I have a feeling we will be finding as many ways as possible to continue to renew them a thousand times over.
Posted on: Mon, 05 May 2014 04:06:36 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015