Tomorrow is going to be a busy day. It will be more busy than today, because of the amount of things I have put off until tomorrow. The list seems to grow larger and larger. Ill get to that tomorrow, if not tomorrow, next week or next month. Something’s may even get put off until next year. The danger is in the short term items, we put them off for a day, or a week or a month. The danger also lies in the long term, which is really just short term put off and extended. Days turn into weeks. The weeks turn into months, the months to years, leaving more than one task undone. Why do we put so many things off? As a lifelong procrastinator, I have plenty of excuses as to why, but I do not have any really good reasons. Ive always enjoyed singing. Years ago, I decided I should start singing at Church on Sunday mornings. I sang at many funerals and weddings. I decided someday I should start singing at Mass as well. I intended to do just that. Someday - someday as soon as I found the time. Linda Akers, the organist at St. Patricks Church had accompanied me, for several funerals, and a couple of weddings. She kept asking me when I was going to cantor (sing) at mass. When I get time, I would tell her, Maybe in a few weeks. The weeks turned to months, the months to years. One day, Linda called asking if I would be in town for the weekend. Not recognizing the voice on the other end of the line, I said Yes, I will be. What did you have in mind? She said her cantor for the Sunday Mass at 10 am, couldnt make it, and then asked if I would fill in. She had me cornered. I already told her I was going to be in town. Back peddling, I said, I might have to do something else. Why dont you do that after noon, and sing for me at ten? It seemed she had all exits blocked, I had nowhere to run. Okay, Ill do it. There is always the fear of speaking, or singing in front of a group of people. What if I mess up? People will laugh at me. I would be embarrassed; possibly humiliated to the point I would never be able to show my face in public again. I would be forced to leave town starting a new life, with a new identity in a faraway land. Like most fears, it was unrealistic, unwarranted. During practice, Linda assured me if I made a mistake, it would be no problem; just keep singing. No one will say anything about it. She declared, If you make a mistake, and anyone says anything to you, just hand them the cantors book and tell them if they can do better to have at it. Sunday came and I sang. I enjoyed singing at Mass, it was fun. More than just fun, it was very rewarding. Why had I put this off for so long? I had many excuses, but again, no really good reasons. That was about 14 years ago. Ive been on the schedule to sing at Mass ever since then. Not long ago, Linda decided to lighten her schedule. She would play only at the 5 pm Mass on Saturday night, no longer playing on Sunday morning. I must admit, it was different singing with someone else playing the organ. For many weeks I have been saying, I want to sing with Linda at least one more time before Melissa and I make our move to Minnesota; a move that is coming up soon. Maybe I could sing with Linda, next week, or, maybe the first of next month. I will ask them to schedule me to sing on a Saturday night. Maybe? Maybe tomorrow I will call. I finally called Linda, to tell her I wanted to sing with her again before we move. She said she had not been feeling well, but when she was feeling better, we would do it. She asserted “we’ll have fun, I would like that.” A week or so ago, Linda, still not feeling well, went to the Emergency room. They took her from the hospital to the Hospice House. She didnt even know she had cancer, but her cancer had grown and spread so fast, there was nothing they could do for her. When I heard the news, I went right out to visit her. Linda was resting peacefully. Her husband Frank and daughter Molly were in the room with her. We chatted for a while; they caught me up on her medical situation. They told me how Linda enjoyed playing the organ so much over the years. She just loved playing. Frank said. She loved playing for weddings and funerals too. He continued, Do you know she never took money for playing a wedding or funeral. They always offered, but she wouldn’t take it. She just liked to play. It really got me when Frank said, She especially liked playing when you would sing. She really enjoyed that. I turned away a bit as Frank was sitting to my right, but Molly was sitting to my left. I looked straight forward, acting like I had something in my eye, so as not to get caught as I brushed a tear away. I really liked singing with her too. I said. Linda didnt go back to her house. Instead, she went home to the Heavenly Father. I just wanted to sing with her one more time before we moved. That didnt seem like too much to ask. How was I to know that she was going to move on before I did? We dont know. We never know. Still, we keep putting off until tomorrow, as if there is no limit to time available...tomorrow. We put off things we should be doing today. Important things. Often, they are simple things that we dont realize their importance until it is too late. I, along with several other cantors, will sing with Linda one more time. I will sing for her with all my heart at her funeral. If I should make a mistake, Ill just keep singing. If anyone says anything about it, I will hand them the cantors book saying If you think you can do better, have at it. As for Linda, I know she will continue to play. Now, she will play as a chorus of angels sings along. Shes that good. As for me, I will have a little more time tomorrow to get my work done, as today I will take care to do the things that are important. I will do the really important things; the things that perhaps cannot wait until tomorrow.
Posted on: Thu, 29 May 2014 12:43:28 +0000
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