Tonight I watched with tears as my miracle eight year old (very shortly to be nine) auditioned for Springfields Spring Musical The Little Mermaid... Do I always notice EVERY single milestone of his with pride that is beyond? YES! Do I often cry???... NOPE... hardly ever... but today... TODAY was different because exactly nine years ago today on Saturday, January 15, 2005 Josh and I were told to abort Jett and his twin brother Seth... not once... not twice... not even three times were we told to terminate our pregnancy by the Fetal Maternal Medicine Specialist who had examined me and reviewed our case... but FOUR times... yes four times. Why not a fifth time do you ask? ... because my husband Josh everything except hit the floor falling off his chair passing out holding my hand at the bedside needing his own medical help as the doctor wouldnt stop recommending it even after we told him that just wasnt an option for us, yet he continued to tell us how we would be under Ohio law as you are only 20 weeks It was by far the very worse day of my life. We had been told the day before by our OB there were options to save the pregnancy. He slowly and clearly went step by step how none of those options were doable. They were unsafe at this point of my labor. Any of the options were almost certain death for at least Baby A (Jett) and Josh and I were told my life was also at risk. There was no action that would keep these babies inside of me. From his experience (and hes the best) he promised that where I was in labor I would FORSURE have the boys within 12 hrs. No questions asked... period. I could induce... I could terminate... but I would NOT be pregnant in anymore then twelve hours even if I did nothing. We choose for me to lay there... for as long as God would allow them alive in me... an hour... three... twelve... but I was not going to rush it... I gave it all to God... and when they came... I would hold them... I would love them... and I would trust God that He would hold us thru it all. NOT ONE TIME did I believe that doctor was wrong... Josh and I knew that within twelve hours our babies would be in heaven. I could never begin to describe the anguish a parent feels when they are grieving the death of their perfect alive babies inside of their mommy before they are even born. We asked our family to leave the room after the doctor left, mad we didnt agree with his advice, and as they all walked out in despair... Josh crawled into the hospital bed and laid with me... the bellowing of sobs and tears from that bed behind the closed door in Special Care Room D haunted them as they walked down the hall. All the hope was gone... we accepted what that Specialist said... and knew medically he was right. I am here to tell you today that God LOVES us... and He WANTS to give us ALL the desires of our heart... He CAN do what no other can... and although THAT day we accepted Jett and Seths death sentence... our Heavenly Father, who loves us even more then we loved those twin baby boys or the dreams we had for them, was on His throne and said You just watch... I have BIG plans... Im gonna blow your mind! Our God is good in life and in death... He is good! On Saturday, January 15, 2005 man promised us death... God breathed LIFE and TODAY... nine years later I watched that little boy on stage SING and DANCE and say My name is Jett. I am in second grade, and I am at Holland. NEVER ever EVER put limits on what our Savior can do. When all else is lost... He IS!
Posted on: Thu, 16 Jan 2014 03:40:33 +0000
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