Trinity Trin comes from a feral community, but she is young enough to be socialized to humans with relative ease. Relative ease is a relative term of course. I will not assign her the label of feral, or even semi-feral. She uses the litterbox, she exists around humans, and I have made great strides with her. Instead, I will say she has some (well earned) trust issues and needs time and space to work them out. When she finds her special people, they will probably have to follow some of these steps. She has come a long way, but a new situation will cause some things to backtrack, and she will also have to learn to trust new humans. She has been with me for a month, and from the outside these may seem like little gains, but from the inside... Wow, the progress she has shown has made my heart soar. To have a wee thing that afraid, who then trusts you enough to climb up near you and allow you to pet her. She looks at me now with this yearning; she so wants to be cuddled and loved. I cant wait until she trusts me; or her forever family enough to do that. (And she will!) There is no greater honor than seeing another being allow you into their circle. I want to spell out all that I have done with her, and all her milestones. This is a huge post, but its so important. This is not a process that can be rushed, steps cannot be skipped because the humans (remember- the entities that had NOT earned her trust) are in a hurry for results. I also want to explain that I am NOT a professional, an expert, or the like. I sought advice from Alley Cat Allies, a group that works with feral cats, I spoke to other fosters who had raised semi-feral and/or shy kittens, and did some research online. Then I became someone who paid attention to what this kitten in this situation was telling me; and I acted appropriately. This is the progress to date: *When she first came here, she would not come close for any reason. She hid behind things and would not come anywhere near me. *She started to come to where I was in her line of sight. It was across the room, but she was visible. *She would not venture closer and would run if she saw my eyes. I started looking at her through the camera on my phone. That way I could observe her, and she didnt see my eyes. *We progressed to where I could look at her peripherally, and with slit eyes. *She started coming a bit closer if she thought I couldnt see her. *When the other kittens got treats, I would place one in her line of sight, and then move away a bit so I couldnt reach. Then I turned my attention to the others and she would inch forward to get the treat. *I used the treat system, moving things closer and closer. Not always closer to me, sometimes close to where the others were snacking so she was part of the group. *I have engaged her in games with the wand toy. *I pet and noodle with the others near her. She has heard more than one purr fest and it has drawn her closer. She seems so very interested in joining on several occasions, but isnt there yet. *I have had to handle her for medications and assessment, so I do what is necessary quickly. I hold her firmly and steadily so she doesnt wriggle or twist away. After treatment, I continue to hold and pet her so she doesnt think holding is just for the yucky stuff. ***Note: every time we have had to do this for medication or what not, we have made milestones after. I think I cant overstate the importance of the holding for other reasons that then turns into stroking and petting and soothing voice. *I have woken up a couple times to find her at the foot of the bed, watching. She seems eager to get closer, and given enough time... *I have sat in a chair and put treats near my feet, she has gotten closer and closer. *She has also walked across my lap a couple times to get treats on the table on the other side of me. *I have sat on the floor, and she has gotten brave enough to sometimes walk past me to get to other things. I do not try to grab touch or pet when she does, I let her walk through without interuption. *We got to the point where I can pet her while she eats, but she cant see my hand coming or she bolts. *Last night, she allowed me to pet her while snacking, and then let me pet her when she saw my hand coming over the top/side of her. She then came close when I was petting her brother, tapped me with her paw and got closer. *She got brave enough to venture up and nip my finger. I did a baby yelp and pulled my hand back a couple inches. She immediately backed up, but did not run! This was huge. Then she came back a bit closer and settled in. *And then... she napped after all that, about a foot from me up on the bed. She even closed her eyes, stretched out and turned her back to me. *I am in love. This is what I do still to retain the trust we have established so far. *I respect her limits. *If I need to walk past her, I either turn so my body is at least sideways, and more often so my back is to her. *I try my absolute best not to corner her, though have had to once or twice. She has two exits from her hidey space, so it has meant a lot of running around for me, but I think its important that she knows she has a bolt path. *I get down on the floor and play. *I talk talk talk to her, sometimes in regular voice, often in sing-song voice. *I play a mix of comedians of differing voice timbres on my device while I am absent to get them all used to a variety of voices. *I use snacks and rewards a LOT. I use healthy snacks; freeze dried one ingrediant meats, and brava treats. I want her to trust, but dont wish to complicate her health with junk food. *I use play to bring her out of her shell. *I dont allow her access to the whole house, but only one room. The house is too big, she would get overwhelmed and hide. *When I need to pick her up, I never come at her from the front. Ever. I start snack time or playtime. When she is engaged I put my hand on her gently put firmly and then pick her up. I do not grab or lunge. EVER. It has meant a ton of failed attempts and redos, but is necessary. *I have slowly added petting her while she eats, just to get her used to touch. Also so she doesnt associate every touch with a pick up. *I have allowed her limited contact with the inside cats. She comes from a cat community, and is comfortable with cats. I think she would bond with them over humans, and I want her to get used to people. Instead of her with 8 big kids, I bring out one of the big kids into the kitten space. *I use rolly balls and springs so her natural predator instincts are part of the us time. *I use one of the toys that has things hanging off a stick so that she doesnt associate my hands with attack mode. *I keep calm when she tests limits. She has come close and batted at my foot then run away. I let her, and she had no claws out so it was even more important not to over react. *When she nipped, I didnt react as a mom or human, but as a littermate. I yelped a bit and drew my finger away. *I dont stare at her with open eyes. We exchange a lot of slit eye looks, and slow blinks. *When I do have to pick her up for exams or medicine, I dont immediately let her run away after, instead I cradle her over my heart so she can hear it, and I coo over her with murmurs. I pet her around her ears and head, and sometimes offer treats. I will very slowly release my hold on her, so that when she is ready, she can walk away instead of running to escape. I think this helps her to stay a bit longer each time, she isnt being restrained and just waiting to bolt. *I allow her to have a space that she can hide, that I cant easily access; so she has a safety spot. But not so far that I cant reach her in an emergency. *I dont allow her to get into the rooms that have lots of hiding spaces, crawl spaces and furniture that is low. I dont want her to get into full out panic and have to move stuff or chase her down. I actually put a fitted king sheet around the bottom and up the sides of a loveseat so she cant get into the inner workings and be unreachable. *I have a spare bed in the kitten room, and sleep out there so that she (and the others) could explore my inert sleeping form, I pose less risk to them then. *I read books around them or use the tablet, and ignore her when she comes close so she can get closer without thinking Im going to grab at her. I am hoping that this long, very long, god-awful long post will help someone. Someone who wants to give Trinity a forever home and needs guidelines for when she comes to her new situation. Perhaps to someone who also has a shy kitten they wish to bring around. Or someone who is thinking of fostering, and wants to know what the rewards are. This is the reward!
Posted on: Thu, 10 Jul 2014 13:26:54 +0000
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