Tuesday August 5, 2014 Day XXXI in Xela: Today has been a very odd day for me. Yesterday was so filled with connections and revelations; I am feeling a little in a mental swim. At the same time, I am sensing in a very corporal/physical way the anticipation of this opening. This is an odd mixture of excitement and fear that has resulted in that feeling post-close-call jitteriness. I have been experiencing a liminal thinness, where the transcendent comes near, that is causing me to be hyper-aware, but in a very ethereal sort of way. Starting at breakfast, I noticed that simply closing my eyes was eliciting a deep meditative centering that really pulled me from the present moment to somewhere-something else. If I didn’t have my first day of class at the new school, I would have taken myself to one of the nearby parks and allowed myself to “transcend”. I also have been thinking of my last round of deep centering that took me to a pretty frightening place I was not prepared to enter. I promised myself to await a mentor who could guide me into these uncharted meditative places that can be so unsettling. I decided to just focus on my current task of Spanish language, and wondered if my guide would be revealed. At the 8:00 orientation I learned that my class would be from 2-7:00 in the afternoon. I enjoyed sitting in this school with the images of Ramero, Gerardi, union organizers, and other social justice figures that adorn the walls here. Still I am feeling the pull in my mind. After the orientation, I head back to the house and feel like I am walking through warm water, a certain weight, and deliberateness needed. The feeling makes me think about being in the womb. This might be that my maestro at the school, Rocael, has recently found out that he and his wife are pregnant; he has asked that I offer prayers for his unborn child. I sat in the kitchen area quietly. Noretys and I had some conversation, she working on her English and me on my Spanish. She works with farms trying to produce organic crops and also on the cultivation of medicinal herbs. As I have said before, I am constantly surprised at how much work is needed in the world and how much work people are actually doing. She is a lovely young woman and reminds me of one of my friends form seminary, right down to the gestures and body language. At lunch, Jennifer serves ginger tea and we discuss the point that ginger is medicinal. I also mention my ginger margaritas; I need to look for triple-sec or something equivalent. My guess is that tequila and limes won’t be hard to find. After lunch I drop off my clothes at the laundry up the street. I am already being referred to as “Padre”. I really haven’t been around this neighborhood yet, much less in my collar, so I wonder if my picture is at the post-office with a sign that says, “Call him Padre”. This reminds me that Bill at SamCom suggested I get a shirt for my COM interview that said, “They Call Me Padre”. I am looking forward to seeing the people at SamCom. I go to class and meet back up with Rocael, my maestro I met in the morning, for my class that lasts from 2-7:PM. He is very good and decides he wants to spend the first day or two doing review so he can better assess my skills and abilities. This is the downside of switching schools, but I think the upside outweighs the downside. He is very curious about the Episcopal/Anglican tradition and uses his questions to explore my language abilities, but also his own questions. He had me show him the Episcopal church on the map and wanted to know service hours. I think he may be planning to come to San Marcos. By the end of class, the already swimming brain finally gets tired and it is good the class has finished, but I feel like I have accomplished quite a bit. We have dinner after I return. After dinner, Nate and I have a long discussion about my current liminal feelings and my bodily reactions. We share with each other some of our transcendent moments; his on the streets of LA, mine in Baltimore. We were up late covered much ground. In exploring each other, I think we are discovering similarities, but also differences. We both have the sense that this connection is not accidental. We are trying to discern why we have been brought together, and what is it we are to do with this connection. It is a mystery we are exploring, but I think we are exploring this as friends and colleagues. What a gift to explore with a new friend! I am hoping that when I close my eyes tonight I will not be transported to some liminal space, but that I find sleep.
Posted on: Tue, 05 Aug 2014 23:02:32 +0000
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