Two weeks ago today Patrick and I drove to Lancaster with the kids to visit Daphne and Bear, we hadnt seen them in a while and had no idea until that day that she was dying of Pancreatic Cancer. When we entered the room her eyes lit up and she smiled ear to ear. My heart soared. I soon realized though she was much tinier than I last seen her. The kids ran to her throwing their arms around her and Bear. Oohs and ahhhhs of how much the kids had grown. I didnt want to believe this was hospice and just outside the back window we watched a deer bound through. Looked like heaven I thought. Such a beautiful place. She smiled and hugged me and kept repeating that she loved me and missed me. I kept telling her how good she looked, and she must be getting better. She told me no, that she was ready it hurt too much and she said it so matter of fact. That evening was wonderful. Like we had never been apart. We all laughed and reminisced and enjoyed each others laughing and smiles. She was not sick and when we left I kept telling myself she was going to get better... I couldnt believe that was a hospice facility. And so a couple days later I went back and spent most of the day with her and Bear and her sister Karen and niece Merry and cousins Shelly and Don, Bears Mom Nancy and niece Amy and several others who came in and out through out the day. I was introduced also to Patty. She had been caring for Daphne for the last few months and had become a daughter to Daph and Bear and was such a blessing to them they both exclaimed. Daph was almost comatose that day and she hadnt eaten in several days. Patty painted her nails a beautiful purple. She had lost motor control and was sleeping deeply. When I left she puckered her lips and kissed me and that was the last time I saw her. I know she is in a better place and with her beloved pooches. She was genuinely a good hearted person and made such an impression on me as a young girl with her stunning beauty and vivacious thirst for fun. She knew how to have a good time and that is something everyone could do well to learn. Ill miss everything about her. How slow she would eat her dinner. How she would chastise Bear for picking on me, her ((((unconditional love)))) her ordering roast beef by the pound for the pups. She was very loving and very much a good mother and grandmother to me and while you cant choose and even though I wasnt hers biologically I would cry a million more tears because having her the time I did was such a blessing.... she Chose me to love. Even though I hope to never lay eyes on her daughter again in life -I must send her thanks- because she introduced me to the best mother I never had.
Posted on: Tue, 29 Jul 2014 01:41:22 +0000
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