Unconditional love is love we receive just for BEING. We don’t have to DO anything. We can never fall from grace. How wonderful is that? What we tend to forget (mostly because we want to) is that when we love unconditionally, we love everyone equally. Anything else is… conditional. Yet we enter romantic relationships and, not seeing the contradiction, ask of our partners, “Love me unconditionally… more than anyone else.” Huh? We are loved unconditionally for what we have in COMMON with everyone else. We are loved romantically for what sets us APART from everyone else… at least in the eyes of our lover. To say, “Love me unconditionally for what makes me different from everyone else… no matter what I do, asking nothing in return” is to request a free pass that doesn’t exist. And, honestly, is that something you offer in return? Which is not to say that your partner can’t love everyone (including you) unconditionally and (only) you romantically. It’s just to say that those are two different games, with different rules. It’s not like riding a bicycle, where you can choose whether you want to be a wheeled pedestrian or a human-powered car, depending on which set of laws suits your immediate purpose. Unconditional love celebrates the beauty and perfection of your humanity. It is safe and inclusive. It is also passive. Romantic love celebrates your uniqueness. It is risky and messy. It is also active. It is love as a verb, not a state of grace. It is an opportunity to dance or stumble, but either way on our own two feet. Choose your partner well. Remember that it IS a choice, one that both of you made because you wanted to dance… together.
Posted on: Fri, 25 Jul 2014 19:57:12 +0000
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