WHERE ARE YOU GOING? I feel compelled speaking about our journeys in life this morning on the account of the growing number of individuals Ive been speaking with lately who seem not to be on top of their journeys in life, but instead have their whole life anchored on systems, people, circumstances, organisations, certificates and providence. Personally my understanding of life stems from what Ive seen in my very few years - how so many people with powerful gifts, opportunities and potentials lost out at the latter stages of their lives simply because they werent courageous, daring, hardworking or passionate enough to pursue their journey and reach their destinations. Much later in life theyre full of regret, theyre depressed, grumpy and accusative in nature. They blame their insufficiencies, poverty, loneliness and frustration on the government, community, companies they worked for and their innocent spouse and children. Never contented or satisfied with any amount the innocent, struggling child sends home every month; always complaining, nagging and putting these children under undue pressure. They blame these children who are also trying to sustain themselves and their young families; reiterating the claim as frequently as possible that they are broke and empty today because they invested all their years raising and training them. How unfair. As innocent, loving children who love their parents very much and carry a weak conscience in this regard, we believe these parents, feel very guilty and deprive our spouses and children the comfort they obviously deserve to satisfy these parents and even other relatives, forgetting completely about other peoples parents their age who are comfortable, rich, successful, influential and still relevant. These are parents who at late 70s and 80s still send money regularly to their married children and grand-children apart from properties, assets and businesses they have bequest to them. Of course as religious and traditional Africans our mindsets and immediate excuses are that all fingers are not equal, destinies differ and we all face different set-backs in life and all that, but if I may, our major religions and the good book support and advocate good parents leaving inheritances even for their childrens children. Please note that Im not suggesting we shouldnt care, support or provide for our parents, oh no far from it, my primary advocacy this evening however is for us as career people to do all we can today to ensure at the later seasons of our career journeys and lives we do not burden our innocent children with our responsibilities and cater but rather give them an edge in life. May I announce this evening that degrees and good grades are no longer enough to start off any child on a superior career and comfort pedestrian? Hence, the thinking that Im sending my children to the best schools with the hope that they will get very good or superior employment positions in future, and then take care of me is no longer a dependable retirement security. Let me illustrate, you see our journeys in life can be compared to long distance relays where at the end of our laps we hand over the baton to our children to continue their own lap and journey from where we finished, not for them to start where we started or worse than where we started. Giving your child an education alone in this dispensation is making that child start where you started. You must give more to offer your children the necessary edge. What is this more Im talking about? They are essentials for good and credible future not currently provided by the academic environment your children will definitely need to do better than youre doing today. For example where you live. If your neighbours and community members are way behind you in exposure, intellect, mindset, lifestyle and value system, and you choose to live there also because the rent is cheap you are inevitably grooming your children in an environment that will diminish and confront what you put in them. This is because they will definitely mingle and relate with other children in that environment and with time will begin to speak, think, act, relate and behave like them to a degree. Even if your house is the most beautiful and sophisticated, it doesnt immune your children from the influence of the environment because in life, environment impacts every one. Also, developing the skills, gifts, and talents of your children outside the formal school environment is another important edge. As you may know from history, talented people who effectively deploy their talents are mostly richer, more famous and successful than brilliant people. Also travelling regularly both within the country then outside the country is essential for exposure and good judgement. I laugh most times when southerners that have never been to the north begin to talk about the north in Nigeria, and also at northerners that have never being to the south. In fact at times the perception and impression shocks me. Many educated Nigerians who have never travelled out of their states or regions know little or nothing about Nigerians. Frankly speaking, travelling is an important aspect of self development. All these extracurricularactivities and standard of living of course come at a cost and are very important. For example, the choice of where to live should not just be based on the size, comfort and beauty of the building but also the location. Having Managing Directors, Retired military officers, former and serving ministers and commissioners, senators, government officials, respected intellectuals and leading business moguls as neighbours and community associates will of course impact your lifestyle, choices and exposure. It will also inform who the childhood friends of your children are. And of course enhance the quality of your contacts and connections and that of your children. You dont live in just a house; you live in an environment if you want real value from your choice of abode. This provision is beyond academics, degrees and good grades and its very crucial for the future. These may be areas we have taken for granted or ignored in making life choices. It is dangerous to embark or still continue on a career and life journey you did not plan. Where are you going? In two years,5 years, and ten years where do you hope to be? These are mile stones you must predetermine and plan towards and work towards by yourself. The quality of the journey you have chosen will inform your choices and sacrifices daily. If you want a good and fulfilling journey, you wont play with your work and assignments. You will be passionate and committed to what you do. You will plan your career path to the top of your field. You will shun politics, distraction and detractors in the work place. You will be open to learning new things, taking on new challenges and embracing new ways of doing things. If you want a sweet journey, regular promotion will count with you. Gossip, slander, and treachery wont be your style. You will commit to the vision, growth and success of your company because when your company succeeds you succeed, and when your company goes bankrupt, youre out of the job. Take full responsibility for your life and journey. Choose where you want to live and how you want to live, determine it, dont let your income dictate to you but rather dictate to your income by growing it to absorb the cost of your choices. And of course the higher and faster you climb, the more money you have. In my opinion a senior manager at 35 will probably be richer and will go further than a senior manager at 40 if they work in the same establishment. Plan your journey today, dont settle for less, rather, choose the best and work hard to earn it. You can do it, I promise you, you can, if you try. Its a matter of choice really... Enjoy your day.
Posted on: Thu, 24 Jul 2014 20:00:40 +0000