WHY ME ALWAYS ME. Folks I have a dilemna, a friend of mine gave me a present of a frozen leg of lamb for New Year, now I dont have a freezer big enough to put it in so I decided Id better defrost it and roast the damn thing, no problem there, says you, anyways I prepped it, put it in the roasting dish and tried to put it in the oven, but it wouldnt fit. I tried it long ways, short ways, upside down ways, inside out ways, diagonally, vertically and then I thought i had it, but when I tried to close the oven door, the glass fell out on the floor, pushed no doubt by the shank of bone. Now you could argue I should cut it in two, but that would be too easy if I had a saw, but I dont even have a knife, Id get the dog to eat some of it but hes not talking to me since I booted him in the arse for eating the Xmas ham, in fact he wont come anywhere near me since, so thats not an option, I cant blame him as it took him 2 days to eject my boot from his rectum and I suppose he would be wondering if the same was going to happen to him over the lamb. Now where was I? Oh yes the lamb, Im in a bit of a hold now because when the glass fell out of the oven door it broke, so I wonder if anybody has tried to roast anything in an oven with no glass in the door. I tried various things to block the gap in the door, a sheet of tin foil, 2 sheets of tin foil, a whole roll of tin foil, but the heat escaped, I cut open a tar barrel and tried the metal out of that, I even tried to seal it up with silicone, but that failed, then I tried a plank of wood that I found, it was nearly the size of the gap and seemed to be working for a while, but then it caught fire and smoked the kitchen out. Then I came up with a master plan, I thought Id go on Facebook and see if anyone might have a spare glass door for an oven and a saw to cut the leg of lamb in two, Id only need it for a couple of hours and I could send it back in plenty of time for you to do your own cooking for New Year. I had thought of hitching the wagon up to the two buffalo in the yard and heading for Phnom Penh, but one of them is very nervous since the last time we went there, because of all the hustle and bustle there, coupled with the fact he walked on a traffic cops foot at the traffic lights out by the airport and the poor chap had his whistle in his mouth which he blew on quite shrilly, which in turn spooked the poor buffalo and I had a devil of a job trying to control them and not before we crashed into a Tuk Tuk frightening the living daylights out of the occupants of said Tuk Tuk two doddery old Yanks and their pet pooch, I had an awful job trying to pacify the old codgers and meanwhile the traffic built up and we caused one hell of a jam while we were trying to extricate the buffalo from the Tuk Tuk and it was getting dark and we had a long way to go. So you can see my reluctance to use them in a hurry again. So its a bit of a long shot and a bit far fetched, but Id really appreciate it if anybody could help out, but it would have to be soon, because the lamb is sitting forlornly in the roasting dish and I think it might go off if its left too long, any helpful suggestions would be indeed be greatly appreciated. Regards Tom.
Posted on: Tue, 30 Dec 2014 03:40:27 +0000
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