Warning: Emotional and posting a status. Haha...Ok so, the past 4 years have been quite challenging. It was the best time of my life, but it was also the worst. Ive certainly learnt a lot. A lot about others and a lot about myself. See, I found the love of my life, my soulmate, the person I will spend the rest of my life with, the person who brings so much happiness to my life, the person who makes me feel alive, the person who completes me. However, that person is a woman, as you all know. For some, this was very hard to accept, for others, it was perfectly fine. Not only have I struggled, but my family has as well. I want you to know that it was never my intention, to hurt you or make you feel uncomfortable. I just had to, for once in my life, be selfish and pursue my own happiness. I also want you to know that you werent alone in struggling with trying to come to terms with it. I struggled for about 7 years without saying a word to anyone. Not even to my friends. No one. I lived a great life. Very fortunate and blessed. Most of all, I lived it (and still do) to the best of my ability. I was always there for everyone, tried to make a positive influence on anyone I came in contact with, I didnt judge anyone, and I loved with all I had. I tried to be the best daughter, granddaughter, niece, aunt, cousin, etc. However, deep down I knew I was different because I had feelings that I wasnt supposed to have. I felt ashamed of myself, I felt wrong. Most of all, I felt scared, terrified actually. What would my family and friends think? What would the community think? Would people think less of me? Would they hate me? Abandon me? Im a good person, I have my flaws, we all do, but I try my very best. Im Brandi. The same Brandi you have always known and grew to love. Surely my loved ones would realize that and still love me, right? Well, for some of you, you loved me, but with exceptions. The rest of you loved me unconditionally, which I am and will forever be grateful for. Those of you with the exceptions, I realize it was hard for you and it was a lot to take in. You just needed time and that was ok because I loved you enough to consider your feelings, try not to make you uncomfortable, and give you the time you needed...Its been 4 years now and for a select few, Im still waiting...However, 3 days ago I got a phone call that finally gave me the peace in my heart that I have been yearning for. It may have taken 4 years but I cant even begin to describe how truly happy I am. Dont, get me wrong, Ive been happy, but deep down there was still something missing. The one and only person Ive needed. The one who loved me first. The one who Ive practically spent every day of my life with. My idol, my best friend, my hero. She may not agree, but she loves me with everything she has and would do and sacrifice everything for me. I know this situation is not easy for you, but I thank you from the bottom of my heart for trying and for loving me unconditionally. I now officially have all the love I need and I couldnt be happier. Im beyond grateful for you and truly blessed. I couldnt even begin to describe how much you mean to me and how much I love you. Thank you for being you...Also, for my very best friends who have been there through it all and the reason I held it together, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Each of you hold a very special place in my heart that can never be filled and I love you very much.
Posted on: Fri, 19 Dec 2014 07:25:21 +0000
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