Waxing a little philosophical this morning. Thinking about how people handle situations differently. As a child, I was not given a choice. We were taught by example and by instruction to STAY STRONG. No excuses. No whining. You get up and you show up and you do what is expected of you. With my paternal grandparents living close by and having two working parents I got to witness people who came from dirt poor backgrounds and never had any other options, work hard for what they had and just deal with what ever happened. There was never much discussion about bad news or setbacks. My grandmother would lead me in prayer and my parents and grandparents would just go about doing what they needed to do. This and a parochial school upbringing where discipline was heavy made me a person who finds it hard not to give up on something. If I say I am going to do something, I must do it. If something happens to prevent me from keeping my word, I beat myself up emotionally. In my work life I found it extremely difficult to call in sick or not worry when I had a vacation day. We were taught to never talk about anything outside of our home. All was private. Anyone who knows me knows that this is something that didnt stick. I share everything. Good and bad. I am an open book much to some peoples dismay but that is who I am. We are all shaped by our childhood experiences and what has happened to us. I have learned to appreciate little things in life. I just dont see a tree; I see Gods creation given to us for its beauty and protection and habitat for Gods other creations. Everything is a circle of being and giving and need and love and trials and life and death and pleasures and disappointments. So this is what I am thinking about today. When I first hear that there is a potential for something bad such as a diagnosis for a loved one, or a loss of a job or unexpected expense or all these things that happen, I prefer to wait to see what the bottom line will be before I panic or get upset or start seeing things as completely negative. I try to think positive until proven different. Of course I will worry and begin to pray but you wont see me getting hysterical and throwing my hands in the air and hopping on the pity train. So, this past couple weeks as I received potential news about Charli, I began to pray but I didnt go to the Oh my God, she is this or that and this or that is going to happen and I am going to pile all of this on top of this potential and that potential. I waited, with a little worry of course, but I stayed in control and showed strength (God given) and didnt waste unnecessary time and energy with the what ifs. When I am surround by people who dont do that, it is draining and makes me look as if I just dont understand the situation (You are not getting it because you dont understand the medical end of it) or dont care. I may not have all the medical terminology or know how to spell it but I can hold on and get the information for what it is. I just choose to not panic and wait and see and pray. That is who I am. I wish others would practice this. It would make the whole ordeal easier. My side of the family feels the way I do. They dont all pray but they dont panic ahead of time. Sorry for grammar and punctuation mistakes. I have an Emma Cleary donut handed to me that needs to be eaten. No time for editing.
Posted on: Sat, 12 Apr 2014 15:17:43 +0000
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