We can sabotage our future happiness by becoming negative and unhappy about the results of our life up to now which we dont like, or that we are uncomfortable with. We can become a defeatist and assume that no matter what we do it will never come to fruit and that is why we always fail. We dont always fail but the defeatist attitude will keep us believing that we always fail and that we are useless and hopeless, so we think, Why try! Feeling hopeless, defeated, frustrated etc can have us giving up and not even trying anymore. We may think, Why bother, I know that I will fail and it will all turn out wrong and I will just look like a fool? But we should be aware that feeling defeated, lost and lonely stops us from trying. To get out of the situation to more positive places we must do something - feeling defeated stops us trying and then we can feel miserable and believe that our life is a failure, and that justifies our feelings of being defeated and hopeless etc. It is a self-destructive cycle of misery. If we concentrate on our frustrations, or we lay the blame on others, we dont face the facts and we dont face the truth, so we cant change what is happening to us. Sometimes when things dont go as we expected in life we can take our anguish, frustrations, and anger out on someone else. We can find a target and then throw our fury and accusations on that person. We can feel that we need a victim someone to punish, to blame, so that we feel that we are doing something to make things better. The victim can be the very person that we need to help us and to make things better. But in our misery we install a mental-filter in front of our mind and this filter states that all that comes from the prejudged person is false, and that person must be treated with the utmost suspicion, or at least disbelief. Not only are we making our own life harder because we have issues, but we are trying to hurt and upset an innocent person. No good can come from any of this. People can assume that God will bless them at a certain time, or from their work for Him in a certain way, and when it doesnt come true they can become unhappy, bitter and look for blame elsewhere. It is hard for people to blame themselves because they are not up to standard. Even the Pastor and his family are learning and growing, if things are not as they expect then they need to understand that God is still working in their life, trying to bring them to understanding and to help correct their lives from the past thinking to new godly thinking. Things dont always happen as we expect them to happen and we need to be mature enough to understand that. God will bring blessings far greater than what you ever expected, please have faith and act on that faith. Sometimes when down we can stop focusing on the job ahead and become bitter and angry instead, and that creates imaginary fears and worries that are just not there. This will destroy any family or ministry if people allow it to grow in their minds. As things get worse we can feel that things will never get better. Self-destruction becomes a way of life, negative thoughts, feelings of fatalism, negative filters blocking out the wonders of a happy life and reality, make things much worse. If it seems that things have gone wrong for our life we can make positive changes to take a different path which will bring a different result, or to look at what may work because of what we have tried up to know has failed. But if we decide to play the Blame-Game and point at someone else and blame them for our failures then we deny ourself the chance to change. Focus goes on that innocent person while we continue to stumble and fail because we are not addressing the real problem. So the problem continues... Whatever is wrong in our life will not improve to something better or wont change until we have the courage to face the truth. If we are at fault then we need to put the blame where it lies and not blame innocent people for our foolishness or our mistakes. Once we do that we can see what we did wrong and then do something to make positive changes. We need to get our focus back on what is important for our life. We need to go back to the basics of life and then improve from there. We need to believe in people and that there is hope. We need to escape the Blame-Game and negativeness in our life. Please remember that every failure is simply a lesson. Failure = We tried something and it didnt work, now try something else based on what we learned. If we have spent the last few years focusing on negatives, worries, fears, accusations etc, or blaming someone else for our failures then we cannot fix them - we are concentrating on the wrong thing. But once we face the truth we can make the required changes based on the lessons learned from our past failures. Please remember always that You are not a failure! All people have failed many, many times. It is our attitude to the failure that brings about success or failure in our life. Some see failures as a positive lesson to learn from, and some see failure as confirmation of stupidity and defeat. Please see the different in attitude. Please see that the Blame-Game is fruitless and a waste of time. Please see that a change of attitude can change your life and being brave, facing the facts and then learning from the past is the way to bringing forth positive change for the better for all. All the best from James M Sandbrook.
Posted on: Fri, 24 Oct 2014 01:01:19 +0000
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