We did Jonahs funeral thingy. Parts of it were beautiful, parts of it were heart wrenching, parts were hilarious, parts were very frustrating. But, we did it. We got through it with love and tears. I happily saw a lot of people who I hadnt seen in forever. It was truly great to see them all. To have them in my room. To say hello. Jonah gave me that as his parting gift. People kept thanking me for hosting his memorial, but it was actually the very least I could do. Its hard to think of my friend as ashes. I laughed and laughed during his roast but I came home and cried after it all. I couldnt sleep. I said to Kevin: well, this was a good send off. His response? Yeah, I think hed rather not be dead. That would be a better send off. It would definitely be BETTER, but it isnt what we got. Ive known for about 7 years that this kid needed a new heart. Didnt make it any easier to stomach his death. Ive known for about 7 years that his poor mother would eventually, most probably, bury 2 of her children. Ive never been able to look at her and not have that thought in the bad of my mind. As a mother, its unbearable. Yet, she bears it. I wont lie. I suggested to the family that they not do the roast. That they not have drunken comics make fun of their dead son. Jimmys response? Its what he wanted, and he beat the odds. Here, here. I am going to miss Jonah so very, very much, I think wed all be blessed to have 1/2 of the friends that Jonah had. I couldnt stop marveling at the 300+ people who came out to celebrate Jonahs life. Im in denial because I cant believe hes gone. Ill miss you, kid.
Posted on: Tue, 30 Dec 2014 04:24:23 +0000
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