Weirdo Drinc Short Story: The Big Reveal: One day long ago, during the reign of Lord Flare, the aforementioned Lord called upon his four fiercest commanders into his throne room of Flare Castle. One was Dr. Dilemma, a tall humanoid with pointy ears and black shaggy hair who cared nothing for social norms and therefore wore a black pajama bodysuit with a crescent moon on the center and a purple cape. He also carried a black suitcase with a dark U written on it. He wore an expressionless face, as if he were nothing but a zombie. Another was Maxind, a purple alien creature with a turquoise face with no mouth, enormous ears that looked like cannons, a white crystal in the center of his body, a gray cape, and orbs all sticking from his body. He crossed his arms, obviously displeased with the fact that he had to serve Lord Flare. One was Flareo, a hothead with red and yellow flames and fiery feet and arms. He was grinning, obviously pleased with being as amazing as himself. The last was Weirdo Drinc, a wispy purple ghostly creature with blue hands and a long tail, one with triangular yellow green eyes and a red triangular mouth. He was blurting out random nonsense such as Wobbleworks and Cheddarfield. Lord Flare came up to all of the commanders and huffed. Alright, how have each of your missions gone? Maxind was about to speak, but Flareo said, Mission officially OWNED! I totally rule! I completely obliterated the armies of those 5000 universes you asked me, and they are now officially under your rule! I think youve got only a couple hundred universes left before-- Youre not paid to think, Flareo, Maxind interjected while slamming his two tails onto the ground, If you were, you would probably make less than minimum wage. Flareo growled. Oh, yeah, Maxind? I dont see YOU having any Hole Pieces on you, now do I? Perhaps not. Then again, neither does Dr. Dilemma. But at least we are not as thick-headed and stupid as you are. Flareo blazed even brighter, yelling, OH YEAH? TAKE THIS!!! Flareo was about to ram into Maxind when Lord Flare got in the way and said, Flareo and Maxind, that is enough. You two can settle your differences AFTER were finished debriefing. Flareo merely crossed his arms and grunted. Maxind rolled his eyes and said, Excellent. Now, to continue with my elaborate story, I have successfully infiltrated into World Corps, the Universe-manufacturing company, and have blackmailed them into following your...instructions. Fantastic work, Maxind, said Lord Flare. Now, Dr. Dilemma, how did your mission turn out? Dr. Dilemma said in a toneless voice, I have stolen the secrets you asked for from both of the rebel groups, Absolute Zero and The Warpmasters. It turns out Absolute Zero--particularly the member who took Darknesss Hole Piece--is in fact psychotic enough to try to summon Infinino into the Multiverse to consume it into nonexistence. The Warpmasters have been forced to divert from their initial goal and are now in the process of fighting with Absolute Zero. At this rate, both groups will fall before your empire is even moderately threatened. Lord Flare smiled. The fools--theyre doing precisely what I wanted them to. All is going according to plan. Now, Weirdo Drinc-- Talk to you in private. Lord Flare turned to Weirdo Drinc. If it was even possible, the character actually looked serious. What do you mean, talk to you in private? Weirdo Drinc winked and gave him a thumbs up. Gotta talk to you in private, means gotta talk to you in private. Uh, alright, fine. Flareo, go fetch Leroy for me. Kidnap him, lie to him, maim him--do everything you can to bring that young Sponsored Being to me, alive. Dr. Dilemma, you go with him to make sure he does not get out of control. Flareo and Dr. Dilemma left the castle. Turning to Maxind, Lord Flare said, Maxind--please do me a favor and muster up your segment of the army to kill off as much of Absolute Zero as possible. That would be swell. Really swell. Maxind flew off, muttering about how wonderful it would be if he could get Absolute Zero to kill Lord Flare. Finally alone with Weirdo Drinc, Lord Flare stretched his arms and asked, Alright, Weirdo Drinc, what is it this time? Weirdo Drinc suddenly burst into his usual random jittering. Yo, Lucas Flare, remember when we first met? You know, what with me driving your kid self insane so you could bring me the butterfly who knew the meaning of life? Oh, we had such fun adventures together! Going to Lightnesss garden to find the DNApple, fighting off the World Storm, going through the Land of Infinite Possibilities, fighting Darkness, me losing control of myself and trying to kill you, us meeting our Infins for the first time-- Yes, Weirdo Drinc, I remember those times, now why did you need to speak to me in private? Weirdo Drinc suddenly became serious again and said, Oh yeah, you know how Drincs are these sentient spherical patches of spacetime from the Land of Infinite Possibilities that come in all sorts of colors and have faces? And how they require a host organism to survive? And how, once they find a host, they can live inside the organisms stomach? And that the two can fuse forms in order to create an entirely new being? Well, yes. Well, I am that fused form. Here is who I really am. Suddenly, Weirdo Drinc did something he had never done before: he glowed red, and suddenly started changing form, until he was a short Hothead. This Hothead had yellow inner flames and red outer flames, wearing opaque blue glasses and a white lab coat with a red and blue tie. The Hothead had ordinary brown boulder feet with fire markings on them. Lord Flare was shocked beyond belief. But then he quickly turned agitated. After all this time, NOW you show me who your host and Drinc really are? I must have asked you millions of times, and kept guessing your host was a modified clone of me made by the now dead Climaxo, and now you prove me right? Now, while I am in the middle of my reign over the Multiverse? The Hothead snapped. Yes, Lucas Flare, now of all times I tell you. Although one would think someone with half your brain could have figured out a way to force me to do so. How typically ignorant of you. Lord Flare frowned. This Hothead did not act anything like Weirdo Drinc. Weirdo Drinc was usually too aloof and silly to ever seriously say anything... but this Hothead... he was talking in a serious tone. Far too serious and even bordering on mockery. The Hothead then smiled and said, Anyways, where was I? Oh, yes, of course. Introductions. My name is Scientist Hothead. Yes, my first name is Scientist and my last name is Hothead. I am the last and most powerful of the modified clones that Climaxo created. Im the clone you stole and currently keep stored in your basement as embryo form. In about 14 billion years or so, long after your empires collapsed, you will send this embryo--me--to a planet called Powertopia in a Universe not yet formed, the Posi Universe. At some point after that, I ended up fusing with this Drinc right here-- A small, blue spherical creature with a smily face and little stick arms, legs, and hair popped out of Scientist Hotheads mouth and said, Hi! Im Dia Drinc! See you around! before going back into his mouth and presumably into his stomach. Anyways, yes, after fusing with that Drinc there, I gained the ability to transform into the form called Weirdo Drinc. That makes both me and Dia a half a Sponsored Being each--each one of us possessed half of a tenth of Lectrues Hole Piece, and henceforth once together, were able to become Infinigags Sponsored Being: Weirdo Drinc. Lord Flare did a double take. He had not anticipated this. He certainly did know that Weirdo Drinc was a Drinc, that he had a Hothead host--that much he could entangle from the DNA--but this? Lord Flare responded, Why would you reveal all this to me? Do you have ulterior motives? Scientist Hothead sneered. Oh, no, not as Weirdo Drinc I dont. As Weirdo Drinc, my entire personality changes, and it becomes nearly impossible for me to concentrate on my goals. I have to resort to chance changes in Weirdo Drincs personality to make him revert me back to this form--and such a shift occurred now. After me as Weirdo Drinc finished shoving Weirdo Drinks down the throats of all of your listed targets as you ordered, he started feeling a bit guilty--felt like showing you the truth. Meaning transforming back to me. What a chance event, indeed--this is the very first time I have successfully become Scientist Hothead again after first transforming into Weirdo Drinc and traveling into your deep past. Perfect, really. Now I can get down to business. Lord Flare scratched his head. But that does not explain why you would tell me all of this. Would this not put you at a grave disadvantage? Scientist Hothead put on a sinister smile. No, actually. On the contrary, it puts me at the greatest advantage of all. You may think of yourself as the most intelligent being in the Multiverse besides Infinitel--but you are wrong. Gravely, horrifyingly wrong. Your entire plan to foil the Infins could fail miserably easily; all I have to do is figure out how to control my Weirdo Drinc form, and I could wreak havoc across your entire empire. In fact, theres evidence in the future to show that I will end up doing just that. So really, it doesnt matter what I tell you about myself. Ill end up winning the game anyway. Lord Flare merely snorted. So you too are a slave to your Infin? Do you realize what will happen once the game is over and one of the Infins gets the item of Lectrue? Scientist Hothead merely laughed. Oh, no, Lord Flare, I am no such slave On the contrary. Very much on the contrary. I know what will happen all right. If I actually agreed with my Infins goals, you and all of the other Sponsored Beings would be very much dead--and of course, I would be too, along with every Infin besides my own. You see, I have given my Infin a very hard time by consistently performing highly irrational actions throughout my life that serve no logical purpose whatsoever. Weirdo Drinc is highly likely to be a manifestation of that. But after googols of years of experience through time travel as Weirdo Drinc, I will end up controlling that form at some point--and once I do, I will return to my time and hatch my ultimate plan. Youre lucky I too wish to wipe those Infins out of the water, to put myself in front of them all. Scientist Hothead moved a little closer and whispered, How would you like to help me hijack the Multiverse? Lord Flare merely chuckled. Really? Hijacking the Multiverse, are we? Tell me everything. And so the two began hatching a plan that would have no repercussions for a long time--until approximately 14 billion years in the future... ~Pentachorus
Posted on: Sun, 13 Jul 2014 08:20:20 +0000
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