Well I got a $500 car wash today, but the front of my car is now back to the same condition as 12 years ago last week, when I bought it. My car is officially 17 years old now but still runs well. sadly though rust is in many spots that eventually it will be too expensive to fix any more. spent time helping my friend Angela with some work today. She always gives me a little boost even filling out paper work. Now I have to concentrate on writing my paper, which my intercultural communications instructor very nicely gave me an extension to today from last week. My subject is Intercultural Marriage - Issues with Language and culture and fraud. A subject I have become very familiar with recently. Beautiful day. It was a year ago today my wife and daughter went to the interview in Guangzhou and found that I would need a cosponsor to bring them here. Had I decided that day not to seek a cosponsor, I wonder whether I would have ever dealt with what I have the past month or would I have simply been divorced by now? How strongly will a woman push to come here? Was this the biggest mistake I have ever made? So again, I post a warning to others. If you are involved in an international marriage and you need a cosponsor, do not get one simply to speed up the process. If your foreign spouse is true to you, they will be willing to wait until you can sponsor them alone. If not you will save a great deal of heartache and personal loss later. There is a reason that INS requires that a couple be married two years prior to green card status. There is also a reason for many other rules. Sadly all those rules are thrown out the window by a simple process of a woman saying that her husband has abused her and she is afraid of him. They are taught by others how to do this effectively enough to circumvent the law. Even in a case like mine where the first 2 years of marriage appear to be real and loving and affectionate, a simple misunderstanding of status can devastate your life, when materialistic people compare their lives to each other. This is a common practice at least in specific cultural circles. Of a group of 16 women (17 including my wife), only 1 has shown me that she does not have this attitude of comparing her husbands income and the size of their home and his bank account as the status symbol of the quality of their marriage. Sadly this very good woman is not the one my wife listened to, but rather the self centered manipulative individuals who stated to me as one did recently you screwed up your marriage not her. She was expecting a nice home and financial stability and you were going to support her completely. You fail to measure up and now she is going to leave. you are a loser. It is this type of attitude that is destroying marriages and American citizens by the thousands every year. Proof here is that my wife used abuse claims against me because of the simple fact that we are presently poor. An extremely odd situation from someone who was by far MUCH poorer on her own in China. My marriage to Yuezhi was happy and productive and she showed love and affection many times a day. Until the day she realized that I was going to need her to help support the home for a while until I could get back on my feet. That is the very moment I can state she changed. The cultural difference in this marriage is easily stated as I am an American man and you need to stop expecting me to be Chinese, you are a Chinese woman and I need to stop expecting you to be American. But at the same time there is also the statement, you need to realize the average American does not live like they do on TV shows and the picture that is perpetrated in foreign countries of the romantic nature of living wealthy in American society is false.
Posted on: Mon, 10 Mar 2014 21:10:59 +0000
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