Well babe its been 23 days now. 23 days of tears, 23 days of sadness, 23 days and the loss is still as fresh as the day it happened. Rob came by and got all the angels out of the big tank today and I got it drained :( Rob has truly been a wonderful help with your fish. Im still feeling so sad about them leaving and giving up your dream, but at the same time relieved because I wont have to pay another huge power bill after this month and wont have to buy more fish food. When is this going to get easier? When will I stop wanting to cry all the time because I miss you? I have thought many times life was bad but nothing has ever even come close to this. Maybe I need to start sewing again. That might give me something to keep busy with. The phone is being my biggest problem. Today I called absolutely everyone I could and no one was home. I did call and talk to your dad for a bit. I was trying so hard to be brave and not cry and then he started to sniffle and we were both in tears. When I have to take mark to Missoula for his Dr appointment august 1st I am going to try to work it out so I can get morgan and take her out to lunch and then we can go see your dad for a bit. Morgan and I both found pennies with your birth year on them and we are going to make them into necklaces to always have you close. We like to think they are or pennies from heaven :) Hailee found a penny right after you died and I told her the story of pennies from heaven so well have to make hers into a special necklace too. I love you babe...I was feeling so sad when I started this letter to you and now I feel a bit better. Talking to you always helps :) I love you so very much. Thank you for being such a wonderful part of me life.
Posted on: Sun, 06 Jul 2014 22:59:06 +0000
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