Well, last Saturday I had the opportunity to attend a Domestic Violence/Abuse Awareness Rally sponsored by Just Jesus Community Church in Garner, NC. It was an amazing time of fellowship, enlightenment, realization, and an opportunity to share part of my story. Briefly, I fall on both sides of the fence. There is no question I have been a pretty vicious verbal/emotional abuser. Father is setting me free from that lifestyle and setting my heart at peace. The part about being in an abusive marriage is not something I have shared. But it goes deeper than that. I suspect that my own abuse ignited the anger and resulting abusive personality. I was adopted as an infant. I never knew my natural parents. Did you know that abandonment and being emotionally unavailable can be abusive also? My adopted mom had some issues to say the least. My grandfather beat her with a razor strap until she was in her late teens. When she disciplined me as a child her favorite weapon was a switch. When she got started it was like a whirlwind, she just wouldnt stop. Back in May, on Mothers Day, my kids and I were at a church in Clemmons. As we say there watching the Mothers Day skit Josiah leaned his head on my shoulder and started crying. Then Bekah snuggled up next to me. As i sat there with my arms around both of them I heard, that gentle quiet voice...Honor your mother. At first i thought it was for the kids, then i realized that I had never really honored either of my mothers. We left and spent the day playing. I have been mulling that over since. “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live for a long time in the land the Lord your God is giving you. (Exodus 20:12. Gods Word Translation) then again in Deuteronomy 5:16, “Honor your father and your mother as the Lord your God has commanded you. Then you will live for a long time, and things will go well for you in the land the Lord your God is giving you. Finally, Paul quotes it and makes a very significant comment... Children, obey your parents because you are Christians. This is the right thing to do. “Honor your father and mother that everything may go well for you, and you may have a long life on earth.” This is an important commandment with a promise. (Ephesians 6:1-3, Gods Word Translation). Some translations say, this is the first commandment with a promise. If you look at the Ten Commandments it is the only commandment with a promise. This is tremendously significant and shows Fathers take on its importance. He reveals how important He considers honoring our father and mother is. It shouldnt be a great surprise to us though...He is pretty clear that is how we should approach our relationship with Him, also. I found that forgiving wasnt my biggest dilemna. The most difficult question for me was...How do i honor someone that was never there for me? How do i honor someone that went totally nuts when disciplining. Dont get me wrong, I do believe in spanking and my kids will tell you I do...lol. But this was beyond spanking. (There are some of you reading this who know what i am talking about, even though you have kept it hidden deep down.) As i was preparing to share Saturday Dad began to speak to my heart about this. It is quite simple really. Notice in both Exodus and Deuteronomy He never said, If they perform well as parents... or If they are perfect parents. No, He simply said to honor them. In Romans 12:10 Paul says, Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor;... (New American Standard Version). This began to open the door for me what honor meant. FORGIVENESS is the key my dear brothers and sisters. I shared on this subject last week. If you missed it I would strongly encourage you to read it. The Road to Healing MUST go through FORGIVENESS. Shalom aleichem, Clark
Posted on: Tue, 15 Oct 2013 09:05:04 +0000
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