Well, the hematologist told me that B block tends to affect people less. Not true for me. B block of the chemo issued a pretty good beating (but Im back up from it). The goal was to get home and on my feet in time for Christmas. In fact, I couldnt get on my feet due to a debilitating headache from the lumbar puncture and spent Christmas day in the emergency room attempting to get the pain under control (again!). Rarely does life let things go as planned, and Ive learned quickly that having cancer makes this fact even more true. Im a dreamer and a planner and this has been the toughest lesson. A doctor, colleague and friend told me yesterday to make sure I enjoy every day, and I have been working on this very practice. I spent the last two years reading and typing papers, so turning off the tv and reading a book shouldve been easier than it has, but Im getting better! Recently the SportsCenter broadcaster, Stuart Scott, lost his battle. His thing was to fight until you cant and then let others fight for you. This I am not good at because Im hard headed and independent! Until I heard his motto, I felt guilty about a conversation I had with a good friend a week ago. I say conversation because he talked and I cried. I thought I was going to be tough and tell him how I was doing, but I couldnt form any words. But, his words were comforting and he may not know how much I needed to just let it out (I didnt either). While I continue to fight, please know that your prayers, thoughts, cards/letters, and donations are great blessings. Im learning that youre all fighting for me through these gifts. Thank you! -Jeff
Posted on: Thu, 08 Jan 2015 15:27:29 +0000
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