Well world my entire world just crashed before my eyes my heart is now broken my hopes and dreams are gone my faith inhumanity is forever lost my best friend the one who has never let me down never disappointed me never left my side the one who taught me unconditional love and gave me hope in future who showed me the true meaning,of complete and utter trust my BearBear, my MamaBear my beautiful sweet loving nurse bather snuggler best kisser and hugger took her last breath of air about 3pm. I love my Bear with all my heart I always will. I`m not sure how I will or can go on without her. The idea of going to bed without her or waking up without is crushing every part of me. When Melissa Harvey lost Bears mommy Diamond it broke my heart I then thought of what would happen if I was to lose Bear and just the thought then made my heartbbreak and tears come. When we lost Diamond Love my heart was crushed and what would happen if I lost Bear my heartbroke at the thought. Now she is truly gone not here with me. I failed the only one who never failed me. I let my baby down when she never let me down. I sit here and cry there is no Bear to hug and hold on to while my heartbreaks. No Bear to lick my tears away. There is no BearBear at all she is just gone. She is longer in pain so there is comfort in that she is with her mommy Diamond and her granddaughters Diamond Love and Zoey, she is with all the pups that have past on from parvo. She is up there with. Harley and Davidson right now probably wondering why we ever had two freaky little creatures like that, Dog, Bo, Cleo and Freddy he sharing stories. Budweiser, Jumpers and BooBoo telling her stories. Telling her that no matter what she was lucky and so was I to be blessed with such an awesome wonderful girl like her and before we know it I will be there with her and them forever just like our promise to each other. She will always be at myside she will never leave me alone when I need her the most she will be right here for me until that day I can be with her. Its so hard to say goodbye to her I never wanted to she was only 6 years old. I shouldnt have had to say goodbye today or tomorrow. But here I am struggling for the right words and I dont have any words only tears and heartbreak. My BearBear I cant image my life without you. I decided to go to college because of you, Oz and Bruce you guys impacted me and brought so much love to Johnnie Clifford Holster, Nicholas Dean Shockley, Adam Lector, Kara Anna and me at a time we needed it and you all deserved a house a yard to be spoiled rotten and all the love given back to you and to get that I needed a better career and to get that meant college. I moved to Texas so we all could be together and happy and in this last year and half, the only happiest I have found us with you and your pack. My grandma Strong past my grandpa Hajka has past. Nick had to give up Frodo and Jazzy, Oz has gone to doggy jail, Nick has been homeless, Adam struggles in a motel, we lost Diamond Love, 6 of TallyWahs puppies and 2 of yours, I had a house and had to walk away from it I cant find a decent enough job, I once again live at inlaws in 1 bedroom with all the dogs and now lost you my pride and joy my MamaBear. This last year and half has sucked and losing you just made it worst. I could have and would have kept going forward with this life I have been given and kept pushing down this road I chosen with you by my side, so now what do I do without you. How do I keep going? Im not sure what to do. Do I turn left or right, maybe turn around cant do that cause that wont bring you back, maybe forward I dont know guess only time will tell. This pack of dogs myself included will be lost with you here with us. Who is going to give Bruce his bath or clean Tallys ears out? Who is going to keep Bridgitt inline or tell BabyBoo its time to calm down? Where is Marmaduke and RolliePolys going to sleep tonight MamaBear is not here to snuggle? Zelda has noone to guard her from the others now, Buatar and Hazel want to know where did you go? Princess and Zira licked my tears away for a moment and just knew its not the same as you. HoneyGirl was there right next to you when you left she has tears and didnt leave your side until I had to force myself to get up now she wont leave my side. Bear I love you so very much. No goodbyes today maybe tomorrow or the next. Maybe no goodbyes ever, since I know when I leave this earth you will be the first thing I see with that big ole BearBear smile and happiness in your eyes so maybe it will always be til we can see each other again my love my best friend my everything to me. RIP BearBear aka MamaBear or my mommy girl, June 14th 2008 to December 10th 2014
Posted on: Fri, 12 Dec 2014 00:11:16 +0000