What an incredibly bittersweet weekend. Philadelphia was so much fun. The walk was so powerful. I got to speak in front of all the walkers and tell them about Ben and my mission to fund asthma research and bring awareness to the world. We took our first family picture since Ben died. It was so hard, but so natural all at once. But... there it is, proof, Ben isnt here, Ben isnt in the picture and it all comes crashing down, the reality of it, again. Ben was with me the whole weekend, but I was able to put my sorrow aside and really enjoy my family and the weekend. Ben would have loved this weekend. We ran up the Rocky Steps 3 times, we got a private tour of where the Phillies play, we watched the Phillies win, we went to the zoo, we celebrated Madisons birthday. We had a great time. But still I miss him so very much. Today is Madisons 11th birthday. 11 years ago at 9:57 PM Madison Karen Buckley came into this world. She was tiny, she was beautiful, she made me a mommy. Jeff , Madison and I have been through so much in her 11 years. She is truly my life saver. She is the reason I am alive. I found a lump in my neck when I was pregnant with Madison. I was diagnosed with lymphoma when she was 6 weeks old. She was the reason I fought so hard, she was the reason I smiled, she is my hero. When I was going through chemo, no matter how sick I was, Jeff could put her in my arms, my tiny baby and all would be right with the world. In Madisons 11 years she has helped my fight cancer, she has snuggled me when I had a miscarriage, she has survived having 2 babies dropped into her life, she has lived in 2 houses, been in 2 schools, she has become a superstar athlete, she has grown to be my height, she has survived her brothers death with strength and courage, maybe even more than me, she has shown Jeff and I what true love is, she taught me how to love unconditionally, she is so smart, so amazing and it is truly my honor to be her mother. Thank God for Madison. 💙 Thank you for listening. Peace and Love #benwashere
Posted on: Mon, 19 May 2014 02:02:35 +0000
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