What is it about the construction of a Filet-o-Fish that makes it such a Herculean task? You’d think it would be fairly simple. Bottom of the bun first, cheese, fish patty and tartare sauce in no particular order and then the top of the bun, construction to proceed vertically. Place carefully in a box and hand to customer while asking them if they want fries with that. Apparently this is not the accepted method taught at Hamburger University. The current fabrication method (gleaned from visiting about 6 or 7 different McDonalds over the last 10 or 15 years, separated by over 1000 kms) is as follows. Bottom of the bun first, cheese next (being careful to offset the cheese by approximately 1/3 of the diameter of the bun), fish patty next (offset by the same amount as the cheese but in a different direction), then a blob of tartare sauce (again, offset to the one side so that as soon as you pick up the burger it will ooze all over one of your hands), followed by the top of the bun (offset in the 4th direction) and then thrown lovelessly into a cardboard box and left just long enough for the cheese to weld the patty and the bun bottom together into an irrevocable disaster waiting for the next lucky punter. I have received this very burger at locations from Regional Qld. to Brisbane to as far afield as Sydney. Always exactly the same, as if built from highly detailed engineers drawings. How is this possible? I’ve emailed McDonalds several times asking this very question, always to receive a generic form reply thanking me for taking the time to blah, blah, blah and promising that someone from McHeadquarters would be in contact with me shortly to address my concerns. So far I am yet to get a McAnswer. Other burgers seem to be constructed with at least a modicum of skill. Burgers with more than 4 ingredients too, I might add, so why is it so difficult with the humble Filet? Ray Croc will no doubt be spinning like a gyroscope in his grave and if this isn’t dealt with soon the gyroscopic precession caused by his ever increasing rotational speed will start to affect the Earth’s rotation, and we all know what the end result of that will be.
Posted on: Sat, 12 Jul 2014 00:57:24 +0000
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