What is the importance of marriage in Islam? top The Importance of Getting Married the Islamic Way The importance of ensuring that we engage in life’s most important affairs, such as marriage, in the Islamic way lies in two main reasons. First, marriage is a lifelong project. A minor mistake committed in its beginning may lead to major ones along the way which can possibly create an end to it. If this happens, the couple may not be the ones who pay the price alone, but their offspring too. This certainly will have some negative implications on the society, in which such children are born and brought up. Secondly, projects that carry the weight of marriage in importance, must be set to a certain standard. Such standard, is to align our marriage process with the teachings of Islam, and the deeds (actions) of our beloved Prophet Muhammad, salla Allahu ‘alaihi wasallam. This is one of the reason why Allah emphasized on reminding us, when He said in Surah Al-Ahzab, 33:21: ﻟَّﻘَﺪْ ﻛَﺎﻥَ ﻟَﻜُﻢْ ﻓِﻲ ﺭَﺳُﻮﻝِ ﺍﻟﻠَّـﻪِ ﺃُﺳْﻮَﺓٌ ﺣَﺴَﻨَﺔٌ ﻟِّﻤَﻦ ﻛَﺎﻥَ ﻳَﺮْﺟُﻮ ﺍﻟﻠَّـﻪَ ﻭَﺍﻟْﻴَﻮْﻡَ ﺍﻟْﺂﺧِﺮَ ﻭَﺫَﻛَﺮَ ﺍﻟﻠَّـﻪَ ﻛَﺜِﻴﺮًﺍ It means, “There has certainly been for you in the Messenger of Allah an excellent pattern for anyone whose hope is in Allah and the Last Day and [who] remembers Allah often.” The Prophet’s life was not all prayers (ibadah, in it’s literal meaning). It included spirituality, social, politics, and education, to mention a few. Certainly marriage is not an exception. Thus, when we choose to follow the excellent patterns of the Prophet, it’s wise that we broaden our scope to encompass all aspects of his life. If marriage falls out, I’m afraid; nothing else will fall in properly. Also, happiness in marriage life reflects on one’s attitudes, outside the house. One of the ways we achieve that happiness in our marriage life is to observe Allah, during the period of engagement, while preparing or waiting for the ‘Big Day’. To observe Allah during the period of engagement, let’s go Islamic! top The Prophet’s Way of Preparing for Marriage The Prophet, salla Allahu ‘alaihi wasallam, never failed to remind the companions to be mindful of Allah when they are about to commit to any affair. Such in a way that was emphasized in: ﻗُﻞْ ﺇِﻥَّ ﺻَﻠَﺎﺗِﻲ ﻭَﻧُﺴُﻜِﻲ ﻭَﻣَﺤْﻴَﺎﻱَ ﻭَﻣَﻤَﺎﺗِﻲ ﻟِﻠَّـﻪِ ﺭَﺏِّ ﺍﻟْﻌَﺎﻟَﻤِﻴﻦَ * ﻟَﺎ ﺷَﺮِﻳﻚَ ﻟَﻪُ، ﻭَﺑِﺬَﻟِﻚَ ﺃُﻣِﺮْﺕُ ﻭَﺃَﻧَﺎ ﺃَﻭَّﻝُ ﺍﻟْﻤُﺴْﻠِﻤِﻴﻦَ It means, “Say, “Indeed, my prayer, my rites of sacrifice, my living and my dying are for Allah, Lord of the worlds. No partner has He. And this I have been commanded, and I am the first [among you] of the Muslims.” [Surah Al- An’aam, 6:162-163] The Prophet, salla Allahu ‘alaihi wasallam, also constantly guided and prepared the companions mentally in advance, before they started to search for their life partners. So when he was asked about the description of a good spouse (wife), he mentioned no materialistic values, but characteristic values. He said in a Hadeeth reported by Imam Ibn Majah: ﺃَﻻ ﺃُﺧْﺒِﺮُﻛُﻢْ ﺑِﺨَﻴْﺮِ ﻣَﺎ ﻳَﻜْﻨِﺰُ ﺍﻟﻤَﺮْﺀُ؟ ﺍﻟﻤَﺮْﺃَﺓُ ﺍﻟﺼَّﺎﻟِﺤَﺔُ، ﺍﻟَّﺘِﻲ ﺇِﺫَﺍ ﻧَﻈَﺮَ ﺇِﻟَﻴْﻬَﺎ ﺳَﺮَّﺗْﻪُ، ﻭَﺇِﺫَﺍ ﻏَﺎﺏَ ﻋَﻨْﻬَﺎ ﺣَﻔِﻈَﺘْﻪُ، ﻭَﺇِﺫَﺍ ﺃَﻣَﺮَﻫَﺎ ﺃَﻃَﺎﻋَﺘْﻪُ It means, “Would you like me to tell you of the best one can possess? A righteous (pious) wife, whom pleases her husband whenever he looks at her, protects him (his dignity) in his absence, and obeys him whenever he orders her.” Generally, people start their marriage story (not marriage life) with engagement. What significance does engagement have in marriage story? top The Significance of Engagement in Islam Engagement serves as a consent and agreement from both parties, acknowledging their interest in each other, for marriage. In other words, it’s a ‘kind of’ reserving one another, for a noble lifetime partnership project. The period of engagement can vary from one person to another, from one country to another, and from a culture to another. But those differences between individuals, countries or cultures don’t change the nature and reality of what “engagement” should be, and how it should be handled and lived. In Islam, marriage can take place immediately after engagement, where period (duration) of the engage is actually equal to none. This means, one can propose to a lady, and if she and her kin (Waliyy) agree and accept on the spot, and there are two witnesses, legal marriage takes place. Done! Engagement however, is mostly dragged to as long as the parties involved need, in order to get prepared for the wedding. But the shorter the period, the better it is. The longer is takes, the mostly likely issues and problems emerge. Also, the longer it takes, the more likely Allah will be displeased. Engagement does not create any special relationship nor any sort of kinship between the “fiancé and fiancée”. Their relationship rather remains as it was before the proposal or engagement, until they are lawfully married. This ensures that, whether the marriage takes place or not, both parties will continue to safeguard their religious boundaries and personal modest and privacy. It also ensures that, should any of the parties involved changes his or her mind, no harm will practically occur to the other. So to say, even if another candidate comes forward, he or she will still be able to find a pure partner, for a noble lifetime project.” Since engagement does not serve as legal marriage, should both parties decide to break the “agreement to marry”, none will be liable to anything.
Posted on: Fri, 02 Aug 2013 11:49:41 +0000
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