While in the process of looking for my sons DD 214 (discharge papers), I completely cleaned my office, bedroom closet, craft closet, cedar chest and untold boxes and bags of papers. I never did find the DD 214 form. What I did find was a letter written in 1988 from my mother that I had kept all these years. My mother was diagnosed with colon cancer in 1988, and had gone through her first rounds of radiation and chemotherapy that year. She was broken-hearted because my sister Sharon, my mothers first born, 9 years older than I and diagnosed at age 17 with chronic progressive multiple sclerosis, had sent my mother a birthday card. In it, Sharon had felt a need to tell my mother that she was not the best mother in the world, and that she was like the mother of a friend who borrowed money from her daughter with no intention of paying it back, yet the daughter of this woman forgave her and still loved her. And that my sister still cared for my mother and forgave her even if she was a failure and a promise-breaker. In the letter my mother sent to me, she said that she spent the past three days and nights crying, not sleeping, and just sick with grief. She ended the letter saying that she and I had just spoken briefly by phone and had a little cry about things, that I sounded distant and pained, and that she hoped the letter wouldnt put a damper on my coming to visit them in California as she and my dad loved me and my three older sisters very much. My mother died in 1991, age 64, from colon cancer, within 5 weeks after my father, age 66, died of a heart attack, and within three weeks one of my other sisters, Tai, age 41, died of cancer also. Sharon, my oldest sister, died 5 years later at age 49 from complications of multiple sclerosis. I have always focused my sympathies on my sister Sharon, how she was such a fighter and how sad her life was to be disabled so young and so severely. But my mother, in reality, was the strong one. She bore all the pain and loss that came by way of trials in our family, and her love remained strong. I wish now that I would have shown more support, love and caring during this time. Dont forget that tomorrow may be too late if you dont give of yourself today.
Posted on: Sun, 20 Jul 2014 06:02:39 +0000
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