Why do so many young people in our country commit suicide? A common reason: Catastrophic thinking: when the person experiences a disappointment or reversal they feel devastated. My life is not worth living, the person feels. I am deeply ashamed, I have shamed my family, my friends, everyone. Or I feel terrible about myself. No one loves me. No one understands me. My life is meaningless and hopeless. The disappointment and emotional hurt depends not as much on what has happened but on how we interpret the event , and how we interpret the event depends on how we view the world and how we think of ourselves. Sucidality and deep emotional pain occurs when the interpretation of a life event attacks a persons idea of his/her self, their self worth and identity; and this idea of the self and of life, depends on unconscious values. Many people live, unconsciously with the subtle toxicity of shame and conditional self acceptance, the idea that you are a valuable and worthy human being only if you achieve or get something from others/the world: getting high marks on exams, getting into a good college, finding perfect love and acceptance from another as an antidote to the lack of self-acceptance, getting a great job, a high salary and so on. What is needed then is prevention. Every school in India today needs to teach its students emotional intelligence and emotional self-management. Some important lessons that should be included and infused into every school curriculum: 1) How to achieve a healthy self acceptance. You are human. To be human means to make mistakes and to be imperfect. You are perfect in your imperfections. Its good to make mistakes, plenty of them. Learn from your mistakes without toxic self-criticism. 2) You are unique. You have unique talents and strengths and with hard work and dedication you will discover what these are, and improve upon your strengths. All that you seek can be yours through passion and hard work. 3) Academic success isnt predictive of happiness or success. Achievement and ambition and success is great, but it is unhealthy and emotionally painful to seek and depend on success as a means to feel better about yourself. 4) Disappointments are inevitable in life. Reversals and hardships are to be expected. There is nothing that is so shameful or irreversible that life isnt worth living. However painful life is when times are difficult, it will get better and you will heal, and grow stronger. 5) Learning to communicate with others, develop compassion and empathy. 6) Learning to relax. And how to process and let go of negative emotions: stress , loss, grief, envy, disappointment, criticism, anger, regret, and shame. 7) Discover your principles, values, goals and life purpose. Learn how to make the best use of your strengths and interests in a way that makes the world a better place.
Posted on: Fri, 23 Jan 2015 06:57:38 +0000
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