With my birthday (37th) and Mckillops (5th) in less than a month I have decided that the only gift to myself is to get rid of a 23 year habit. I have tried quitting smoking about a bazillion times, only lasting 3 days - 4 months (once). But something has changed. I have been trying to quit a lot more recently and I now have staff that can help me do the work while , I do the work - if you know what I mean. There are fears and unfamiliar territory for me . To be honest these are things that I will have to get used to: I have never been a fashion designer without a smoke in hand, I will have to do my accounting without chain smoking, I will have to do web design, graphics, social media and hours of running my business without my smoke in hand either. and Since I have been a smoker since the age of 14 the apres coitus will be new to me too . I will also have to find new ways to relieve boredom and awkward situations without the excuse of running outside- or avoiding a situation. I have to live life in a way that I am completely unfamiliar to. For those who have never started you dont understand the hold it has on you. I need to train my brain that life is not going to be without but with that being said this is something I will crave till the day I die- it never goes away. This is going to be a challenge, and undoubtedly will be my biggest accomplishment - It has seen me through rough times, blessings and basically every experience since grade school. I just have 1 thing to say to non smokers first - you have no flucking idea how dam lucky you are and you look at us with such contempt and disgust but you have NO idea what we are REALLY struggling with. So the next time you turn your nose up to someone smoking cause it inconveniences you for a 1/2 second of your life, instead of ripping their head off or being rude- send them light and love in hopes that they can be free someday! and PS The words just quit dont work/support, or encourage so dont bother..... Happy Zyban Month for me - I have 28 days to get ready for the New Ryan !!!
Posted on: Sun, 08 Jun 2014 19:33:47 +0000
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