Would you take your childs autism away? Aside from the great debate over the cause of autism, would you take your childs autism away if you could has to be the one question that will really stir the pot! One reason is there are so many different degrees of autism, the verbal vs the non-verbal, high functioning vs the non high functioning, the children that are more aggressive and on and on the list can go. It is a very personal issue, some people can roll with anything, some want perfection, some accept it and some never will, some parents will do everything they can for their child and sadly some parents walk away. Let me say I do not think there is anything fair about autism or any disability a child might have that robs them of something. I am not saying that they are less of a child because of something they can not do, I am saying they and their parent are robbed of something. A parent craves nothing more then to hear their child call them Mommy or Daddy or to tell them that they love you, so when their voice is taken, that family is robbed of that. That is why giving a child an iPad and giving them a voice is so so important! Autism can drain a family, even the strongest of families when you have a child that has melt downs, especially when that child is bigger and stronger then you. Autism can rob you of friends and family that often do not understand what autism is and feel that you just do not know how to parent and sometimes that family includes your spouse that leaves, leaving you to stay and do it alone. My is 13, has an IQ of 70 and considered low functioning, he is like a six or seven year old. Bryan is also the sweetest, most loving child you will ever meet. He loves to laugh and he thinks passing gas is the funniest thing in the world! He calls his normal routine, Normal, if we go anywhere he likes it when we get home, he strips to his underwear and everything is back to normal. Bryan is very happy and we live for the day and try not to think too far down the road, one reason is because we are his grandparents, our road wont be as long as a parents road would be. Bryan started middle school this year, scared me to death! Having to send him into an environment full of early teens with no understanding of children with special needs and I had nightmares about him getting picked on and beat up. Bryan is in a class with 6 other autistic children, he is met at his special bus by his teacher and walked to his class and anytime he is out of his classroom he is with an aid or a teacher. The first two days of school he ate lunch in the cafeteria with the general population, but he had awful meltdowns when the lunch ladies didnt understand him and other kids teased him, so now he eats in his classroom, he is never around the so called normal kids. In a classroom where the aid has a special song called, fingers out of your mouth, and others. Bryan is very protected but yesterday there was a fall dance at school and the entire school was there, except the class of 7 autistic children and Bryan knew it! My heart broke when he came home and told me about it and that he wanted to go. I asked him why he wanted to go and he said they had food, so I asked him if wanted to go for he food, surprised because he is such a picky eater, but was caught off guard when he said no, they had dancing. I had to go into the bathroom and quietly cry, I didnt even know that he ever thought about dancing and then I cried more because I was sure that if he had danced he would have been laughed at, my heart broke. Then it was trick or treating and he was a little kid again and happy, grandpa made him a great costume. He came home, stripped to his underwear and everything was, back to normal, until he took his shoes off and his toe was bleeding, he hates blood! It didnt hurt, he has such a high tolerance for pain, but the blood scared him and suddenly he was a three year old, crying and holding his arms out for me to hold him and sing him his special song.. Bryan has taught us so much about life and love and changed our world in ways we could never put into words, so would I change his autism if I could? That is so hard because he is my Bryan and I dont see him as anything but Bryan and I accept him just the way he is. Yes, that is the acceptance thing we keep talking about, I accept him. Sure I want him to grow up and have a job, a wife and a family, but every parent wants that for all their children, but that doesnt mean it always happen, even for so called normal children. I would change Bryans stomach condition that lands him in the hospital and in pain so much, because it causes him pain and it isnt who Bryan is. Autism is not who Bryan is anymore then my blue eyes are who I am, they are just a part of us. The autism makes Bryan a little different, my eyes made me beautiful, they only make us something. I wouldnt trade my Bryan for anything in the world, right now, he is happy, but that opinion could change, it is very easy to say you wouldnt change anything when the anything is going so well. Cyndi
Posted on: Sat, 01 Nov 2014 09:59:33 +0000
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