Wounds Often God uses practical life experiences to teach me much deeper truths. I recently had tubal ligation surgery (my tubes tied). In the process of caring for the “wounds” post surgery--I began to see the correlation between physical wounds and emotional woundings we endure throughout our lives. The phrase “Time Heals all wounds” kept coming to mind accompanied by a strong check in my spirit! You know, the kind that sets off our internal “LIE-dometer?” (I know it’s not actually a word...but it fits..lolol!) So, the truth being revealed was, Time, in fact, does NOT heal all wounds! When we have an open wound, in order for it to heal properly it needs to tended! TIme alone does not heal it! In fact, if much time passes without a wound being properly cleansed the chance of Infection setting in is far greater! WIth staph infections, MRSA, on the rise, we all know these infections introduced into open wounds can be life threatening! This reminds me of the night my husband called me to forewarn me about an injury to my sons hand during football practice.This particular night it was FREEZING outside--My son had been tackled from behind--As he was going down---he put his hands down in front of his face and when he did, all four fingers on his left hand got jammed into his facemask. OUCH! So, the forewarning I received from my husband was this, “ “James (Chris’s dad) is bringing him home now...DO not freak out when you see his hand! I need you to clean all the dirt and gravel out of it and tell me if its broke.” Needless to say, the skin on all four fingers had been shredded and was just hanging there-- mangled! His wounds were extremely painful--- as a matter of fact--that night a few of his team mates, after seeing his hand---QUIT the team! His wounds left him bleeding and mangled! And then as if that was not painful enough, in and of itself---the excruciating process of cleansing the wound of all the dirt, gravel, and debri began! As a mother, it hurt me more than him! It hurt my heart! Unless you’re a mother-- you will NEVER fully understand that statement! But all the mothers out there will fully relate! Because he trusted I would never subject him to more pain unless it was absolutely crucial to his wellbeing --he submitted himself fully to the painful process! We cleansed it--- applied a healing salve and bound it up to protect it from any outside contaminants! It was a process! We tended his wounds daily while they were fresh! ON the third day of tending his wounds, his only concern was when he could play football! It had healed so much, in that little bit of time, he was not the least bit apprehensive about putting it in harms way again. My husband told him, “When I can smack your hand and it doesn’t hurt...then your ready!” He went on to explain to him that getting back in the game before his wounds were fully healed would mean he would instinctively, and unknowingly, try and protect his partially healed wound and in doing so---he would leave himself and others on his team- vulnerable to being hurt!! (Relate and apply that simple statement to areas of emotional wounding--- Now that’s some real wisdom!!) I was totally amazed when ONLY one week later his wounds were completely healed! I remember being in awe of how that was even possible--and amazed at how our bodies are designed to heal at a rate that does not even seem possible when handled correctly! He was WHOLE...with no scars and no residual pain! Time alone DID NOT heal those wounds! When we experience woundings to our heart, soul and mind, it feels as if we have been torn open. Sometimes we are bleeding, figuratively, and reeling from the pain. The idea of digging around into the heart of that fresh wound to clean out all the contaminants is often avoided at all cost. We do not want to relive the pain! So, we adapt the “time will heal all wounds”-- “If I just ignore it--it will go away”--”This too shall pass” philosophy. So, with time the pain may dull--The wound may even close, but what has been closed up inside? Have we actually healed? Or have we just become “closed up” with anger, fear, resentment, shame etc.still inside? You know... All the “debri” that entered with the initial wounding was never “cleansed”--no healing salve applied--no binding up of the wound to protect it while it is fresh. Our emotional IMMUNE system is now compromised-- We then assume we are healed because we feel fine yet, we are not really healthy! See, just like certain diseases can lay dormant and can go undetected for a time--presenting no present diagnostic symptoms--These wounds leave us open and vulnerable to “flare ups” of the “dis-ease” all the while, the root cause remains hidden to us. So, we just treat the immediate symptoms instead of seeing the root cause that was buried but not healed! Someone with an already compromised immune system will find it very hard to ‘bounce back’ from even the slightest sickness.Thus, untreated emotional wounds also become the ideal breeding ground for “dis-ease!” For those who are emotionally “healthy” something as small as a mosquito bite will be barely felt, if at all and infection is unlikely!! Yet, for the “emotionally compromised-- something so small can register uncharacteristically high on the “pain-odometer.” The slightest wound or smallest offence is then quick to hurt and slow to heal because the ability to fight future infections has been compromised! The leaves us wide open to developing a “weeping wound” which doctors define as a wound that doesn’t heal because of noxious matter that continues to fester and ooze--YUCK! How many “weeping wounds” can we sustain before our entire system becomes infected? How many of our “weeping wounds” can we, not to mention our loved ones, and friends endure before they put on protective coverings that separate them from us all together? After all, the closer they are in proximity to us the more they witness the “ugly” flowing from us! Its likely that they too, will be adversely affected--infected--or at the least feel “slimed” by the YUCK that flows from our wounds untended! Imagine you have a well concealed wound that others cannot see. A wound you think the covering up alone has healed because you do not feel the pain you did when it first happened. Now Imagine someone unintentionally bumps into you. This bump happens to be a direct shot to the area thats (unbenounced to you and them)Is still tender to the touch! The immediate and intense PAIN you feel when its “bumped”, causes instinctive, often violent reaction in response to the pain!We may lash out at them in anger and attack them---We may go into instant defense Mode--We may judge they are no longer trustworthy! We may even withdraw from them altogether so they can never have a chance to hurt us again. The funny thing is--in this moment--we actually BELIEVE our behavior is justified!! After all, the pain is real---therefore it cannot be denied or talked away as nothing! Even their sincerest apologies and claims “it was a total misunderstanding” or “I did not even mean it that way” go unheard by us! Its total “talk to the hand” mode for us at this point. After all, the pain must be proof that all their explanations are simply excuses for their unacceptable behavior towards us. Just as I have been the above wounded one who reacted in kind--out of my pain. I have also been the one who has stumbled, smack dab, into others carefully concealed wounds! Having been on both sides of this vicious cycle-- I can rightly judge one thing! It sucks for both sides! Imagine you are the one who innocently and without malice bumps into anothers raw tender spot ? Talk about feeling you have been sucker punched without a single warning! You did not know the wound existed. You did not know to be extra careful when manuvering around them. After all, How could you? See, When you feel you’re walking into a hostile environment, its natural to have your guard up to shield yourself from enemy fire-- But with those i, we have our inner circle we have no guard up leaving us extremely vulnerable to being severely wounded! With them we tend to feel safe so we have no defenses in place to protect us so, when we stumble unknowingly into an area of theirs that’s still tender…. the backlash we receive is unexpected! All we know is we are under attack by ones we love and were supposed to love us! The outbursts,accusations and judgments coming our way easily wounds us! From our place of pain, we fail to recognize the true culprit behind the attack! We feel misjudged and betrayed by those close to us! After all, how could they ever believe we would intentionally hurt them? How could they misunderstand our intentions and think the worst of us? Worse yet, how could they spread this unfair information to others? etc... While we cannot deny the level of pain they are in is real! We are justified in feeling the attack we receive is unwarranted and unfair because WE cannot SEE the wounds we stumbled into! We take it personally! And so, the vicious cycle of wounding each other continues! For the past three-four yrs. God has been teaching me about woundings through some experiences I have went through. One day in prayer I was seeking God about an all out vendetta a person had against me. I could not understand it. I had never hurt her. I only knew her slightly, yet she had extreme hatred towards and had formed some very strong judgments about me that she was quick to share with all who would listen. It was a very confusing time for me. What I heard whispered in my ear that day was powerful! “WOUNDED people WOUND others!” This set me free! I saw a vivid picture of the she one who had done this to me. She was broken and bleeding from wounds she had tried to conceal but were oozing with infection. My heart broke for her! I could see clearly this attack was never personal at all! I unknowingly had grazed one of these wounds! The affects of doing this were clearly felt, but not understood until that moment! Little did I know from that experience God began a process of shining his light on my own unhealed wounds….and the process is not over yet either! It takes time to go back into painful places and dig around...but the healing that comes when the salve of truth is applied and lies we believed (the uncleansed yuck) is washed away is well worth the pain! The funny thing is that up until that time I thought by the grace of God after all I had been through, I was pretty darn healthy..lol! Boy, was that a big fat lie...lol! The vicious cycle goes round and round if the LIGHT never shines in the dark places to expose the true culprit...the untended wound in need of healing!! A few yrs back I went through a very hard year and faced something I had never had to deal with before. Some judgments were formed about me and spread until they defiled even some close to me, who had seen my heart enough and been close enough to me to know me better than to believe them. It wasn’t so much the one who spread the false judgments that wounded me. They had not really seen my heart or even been a safe place for me in the first place but those who started to believe them who knew me...now Those were the ones that hurt my heart! While it was a lonely and painful time for a season God never wastes our place of pain if we seek him for understanding! I struggled with not allowing that which hurt me to cause me to become bitter towards the ones responsible because i knew the bitterness would eat me up like a cancer!! No way was I going to allow to allow that but when its in your face non stop its easier said than done! The key to never getting bitter and being able to still love the very ones who had pure hatred towards me was found in prayer! Whispered in my spirit….was this simple yet POWERFUL statement, “ WOUNDED PEOPLE, WOUND OTHERS!” See the vicious cycle of hurt that keeps bouncing back and forth until we build up so many walls of protection that we become imprisoned behind them and can never truly feel or love one another through them! We refuse to tear them down for fear of being hurt, betrayed, or rejected again. The unhealed wounds keep building, bouncing back and forth, creating hordes of wounded unhealthy people and families who continue to wound others? We appear healthy to the naked eye...but if seen through the eyes of the spirit...that searches the deep and hidden things….what would we actually look like if all our “weeping wounds” were evident? When I heard…”Wounded people, Wound others.” I saw the a picture of the one who had caused me such unwarranted grief and what I saw, broke my heart! I hurt for her! She was broken and bleeding through the makeshift bandages that covered her. The wounds she had endured were brutal making it hard to be in close proximity to her without accidently grazing at least one of those open wounds! IN that moment, All the wounds I had developed through this were healed! I realized it was NEVER personal...It was NEVER really about me personally at all! Something in me was considered a threat! A reminder of the thing/ things that had wounded her initially. I was a threat that needed to be eliminated and if the ability to eliminate failed….then CONTROLLED! “Oh, and everyone else I come into contact with needs to be warned about her too!” I am sure a major irritant to those wounds was the fact that while I will fully submit to those in positions of authority over me….. I buck being controlled by anyone whose motives towards me are not pure! (touched on my own wound right there... but that story will have to be told another time!..lol) Out of this painful situation, I was taught some powerful lessons about the damaging effects of wounds untended! I began to recognize when some behaviors in others are stemming from an unhealed wound. I now have a greater compassion for the hurting. Needless to say, I have been going through this process for a few years now and still find others can accidently “bump” into tender spots I did not even know were there! I am learning though when my level of anger,frustration, or pain, is not enough to warrant the reaction it causes in me….or I am instantly relating it to the same thing so and so, did in the past….or things rise up in me to say this is the last time I let this be done to me….Its a clue past issues caused the wound that is NOW clouding my perception of others and situations! Its my clue to ask God to shine light on the root wound and expose the lies I believed at the time and replace them with His truth so I can really be whole and healed!! There is way too much too share in one post so, should I say….TO BE CONTINUED??? LOL
Posted on: Sat, 23 Nov 2013 13:37:06 +0000
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