Yesterday was an absolute whirlwind. A completely mind-blowing, heart breaking, eye opening day for multiple reasons. Not only was it an anniversary of a death that I wish had never happened and would do anything to change the outcome of, but I got the eye opening fact that the father of my unborn child just simply isnt going to be here for us like he has said he would be over and over again. A piece of paper and other women are clearly more important than his own flesh and blood that he created to bring into this world. It is truely heartbreaking that people are actually ok with that type of situation and find it to be normal or acceptable just because its 2014. Anyways, the business Ive been in has taught me so much over the last few years. Ive become such a different person that its unbelievable. 3 years ago I would be handled these situations in a whole different manner big time. Time and time again I have people say to me I would not want to be in your situation, I have no clue how you are holding yourself together like you are. At first I kinda brushed it off and laughed about it because its just the way things need to be handled. Me stressing out just puts stress on the baby and shes what I have to think of first and foremost. Well after yesterdays insanity it gave me a lot of time to think and process some things. Over and over again I had people inboxing me telling me how much they love me and admire me for my courage and strength. I had a few different people show me things where other people I dont even know mention the same thing about me to them, yet weve never met. But theyre clearly watching and know whats going on (My life isnt perfect and Im certainly not going to pretend it is or try to hide in the shadows). To know that people who Ive never spoke to personally, or met, look up to me and gain strength and positivity in their own lives just by watching me handle my chaotic mess of a life is awesome. To think that I may be the reason why someone hasnt given up on something whether its their business, or a relationship, weightloss, life in general, or a hobby they wanted to throw the towel in on blesses my heart beyond words. Each time I heard this my eyes immediately teared....Maybe its the hormones...maybe not? lol Im by no means perfect and thats exactly why I dont hide behind shadows and I dont only post positive happy stuff as if my life is such all of the time. My life is chaotic, like Im talking absolute insanity. I do have a great job which is a total blessing and not luck at all. Ive busted my ass to be where I am with my business but even that has its own stress. My checkbook isnt perfect like people have this crazy idea in their heads. I have more bills than most seeing I pay everything for a household that is normally shared between incomes and its just going to get even harder now that I have insurance and a baby to take care of and pay for all by myself. So if anyone thinks I have it easy.....Stop.....cause I dont. Am I blessed yes...but I work my ass off for everything I do. My point- Every person on the planet has issues in their life. The outcome is all in how you handle it. You either hold your head up high and run full force and tackle the issue....or you let it defeat you. Im just glad to know that I do in fact inspire people to better themselves and keep a good positive head on their shoulders. For those that do...I thank you :)
Posted on: Wed, 24 Sep 2014 19:32:32 +0000
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