You know, you can be lean and still be miserable, and you can also be miserable without being lean. Its really a choice. For future reference, when I say lean, I definitely do not mean skinny. Im not about skinny for myself or for any of the women I work with. Im all about strong, capable, fit bodies, and that looks different on all of us! So....... If diet and exercise are all consuming for you then you may find yourself never feeling skinny enough, or fit enough, or good enough, and as a result, that self-loathing can push you into a cycle of extreme dieting and exercising. You may shame yourself over mistakes, hating and punishing yourself for eating that cookie, or ten, last night and vow to punish yourself the next day by starving yourself or working out harder because youre afraid of getting fat. Believe me, I get it! Essentially what youre doing is hating yourself into leanness, working out and eating less because you hate yourself as you are, not because you love yourself. Ugh!!! Ill tell you a little secret; Self-love and compassion are truly integral components of any healthy fitness or fat loss journey. Theres no shortage of information about nutrition, exercise, sleep, hydration…but what about love? What if we loved our bodies right now, exactly the way they are? Perhaps that might allow us to actually enjoy the fat loss process, looking forward to making healthy food choices and exercising knowing that we are doing the things our bodies need in order to lead healthy vibrant and productive lives. Actually, the way we think about our bodies is the most important tool we can hone in terms of physical and mental transformation. Our weight and shape will inevitably fluctuate throughout our lifetime, but if we’ve developed a loving, positive mindset, we wont be as likely to base our happiness on what our bodies look like alone. That doesn’t mean you can’t improve or that you’re complacent. Positive psychologist Tal Ben Shahar calls this approach “Active Acceptance,” the concept that acceptance without action is resignation. He says, “active acceptance is about recognizing things as they are and then choosing the course of action we deem appropriate and worthy of ourselves.” We can choose the appropriate course of action when we choose awareness and acceptance over judgment and shame. Once we learn to love and accept who we are now, we can have the clarity necessary to not only develop sustainable healthy habits, but to give ourselves some grace when we slip and fall. This means that if you gain a little weight, or have to skip a workout here and there, you wont spiral out of control, because you know that it’s not going to define you. Mindset has to come first, in order for fat loss to really be sustainable. As women, we must detach our worth and happiness from a number on the scale or the size of our clothes. I’m not saying you shouldn’t try to lose body fat or change your physique. Quite the opposite! With mindful eating, compassion, and a great training program, you can lose fat, build strength, and increase performance. But youll be doing it because you love yourself, not because you hate yourself and feel you need to be punished. And seriously, being lean doesnt equal being miserable either. But dont let your desire to get there take over your life–don’t let leanness be your only dream, the thing you need in order to be happy. You have so many other reasons to live joyfully now, being grateful, and giving to others by being the best you no matter what the scale says, and none of that depends on whether or not you lose or gain weight this week or even next. So starting right now, love yourself, and take care of your body because you want to nurture it and show it compassion. In turn, you will love yourself lean, with positive self-talk and a nourishing diet. Compassion, acceptance, and love are sadly not things we inherently show ourselves. They take daily practice and constant reminders. But, they become easier to embody when you think of the alternative: hardship, misery, self-loathing, punishment and deprivation. Yuck!!! Nothing worth having should ever make you feel miserable and alone, and no amount of body fat lost will make you love yourself. You’ve got to dig deep for that. And when you do, I think you’ll really love what you find. Stay Strong! Your Trainer
Posted on: Wed, 30 Jul 2014 17:02:29 +0000
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