You might be a Pentecostal if… 1. The amount you spent on hair spray exceeds your gas bill. 2. You (or the ladies you know) can swim in a denim skirt and still have fun. 3. It takes longer to TAKE prayer requests than it does to pray for them. 4. You run into half of the church members on one trip to Walmart. 5. The musicians at your church can tear it up, but none of them can read sheet music. 6. You have 50 pair of “church shoes”. 7. You use nail polish to stop runs in panty hose. 8. Running the isle and shouting is your weekly exercise. 9. You could be an Olympic kickball player with all the practice you get at church functions. 10. Your white choir moves like Kirk Franklin’s group. 11. You have adequate respect for the power of flying bobby pins. 12. Your feet have been stomped on at least 3 times in 1 service. 13. You judge a church service by swollen eyes, rumpled clothes, and disheveled hair. 14. Your kids know how to each crunchy things quietly. 15. When shopping for shirts they have to pass the “Praise the Lord” test. 16. Sunday and Wednesday means no cooking and dishes. 17. You can maneuver into a vehicle without messing up your hair-do. 18. Celebrating your 21st birthday doesn’t mean that much. 19. You can always find bobby pins on the floor after a good service. 20. You can pronounce “Habakkuk”. 21. Growing up you’ve baptized your siblings and cousins several times in the swimming pool. 23. The only thing longer than your prayer list is the hair of the ladies you know. 24. Going camping means going to church camp. 25. You address everyone you know by “Brother” or “Sister”. 26. Your hair sets off the alarm system in the airport. 27. Getting ready for church is an all day affair.
Posted on: Sat, 13 Jul 2013 17:46:08 +0000
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